Car Trouble in Port Royal
by alissaduke88
Summary: An odd road sends a girl unknowingly into the past, with the cast of POTC. More of a comedy than a romance, Mel Gobson jokes ensue, and everyone gets a jab in. Rated for language.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer!

Don't own a thing. Except what I bought, but I'm even sure someone else still owns that stuff. POTC is not mine, and even if it was I would give it away! But I won't say to whom! Grins Evilly It would fetch a pretty penny in Tortuga! Well on with Chapter One of my story yet to be named!

Chapter One: Stupid Gas tank!

Four months. Yup. Four months living in San Diego California. Why? I graduated, lived in Spain for a year, traveled the world. Came back home to Michigan to find it snowy and cold. That is exactly the reason I packed up and headed to San Diego. Four days in a car, a month searching for a job, and three months of the same ol' same ol'. I was a girl of adventure! A girl who spoke seven languages! Not including the one I made up in the eight grade!

Whatever.

So here I was. Running errands like a typical almost 21 year old living on her own in a big city. What else did I have to do? Study? Pah! Over my dead body…Erm, on second thought… Grocery Store, Drycleaners, Hair dressers, Beach…I'm a busy woman, living the hard life! Doing a little shopping for this, shopping for that, mostly shopping for this, not so much for that.

Although I had been living in North County San Diego for four long, warm, palm tree filled months, I still got a little lost at times and had to call up a friend or two to guide me back to the good life. Good life being a little flat on top of a house. My two room glory with own mini bar like fridge, void of alcohol.

Today was no excuse, here I found myself turning off at the wrong light on Santa Fe and you know something? It was the first time I saw trees, not surrounded by concrete. Mouth agape I decided to drive down this road some more. It gave me a warm feeling, like being back home in Michigan. I turned on my CD player in my car to play some of my favorite songs from my MP3. Yes, a MP3, I don't like the Idea of an IPOD, they cause cancer you know!

Soon I was the only car on the road, which was starting to look more tattered and torn as I kept driving, that being said it was odd because 'The Great County Of San Diego' prided itself on nice roads, except Los Angeles near Oceanside… For those of you who know… You know. Never the less, I'm from Michigan, we drive on dirt roads that have huge cavernous pot holes and you have to drive across twig like bridges over roaring waters… Here people swerve to avoid puddles.

Much to my surprise the road dropped off to become dirt. Ironic I was just thinking about dirt roads! No side walks, no huge complexes, no shopping centers, no bus stops. I started to get worried that I was going into some really rich guys drive way. Looking for an opportune spot to turn around I was having no luck as the trees were dense and thick next to my car, I had slowed down considerably and was watching my mirrors closely hoping the thicket would break soon so I could turn around. That is when it happened. I glanced at my gas meter, which had recently been on full. (I had just got paid! I was shopping of course I would fill 'er up!) I saw a car shaped box up ahead which I pulled into quickly. Turning off my car I jumped out cutting my leg on a branch.

"Damn that was smarts!" I said wiping the blood from my leg and wiping it on the grass next to me. Bent down is when I smelled it. Gas. Not mine! The cars! A second later I saw it pouring out of my car. The puddle was getting massive and I was worried things would get worse. I popped my trunk and rummaged about in it until I found my gas can… which of course was too tall to fit underneath my sports car low car.

Freaking out I grabbed my good 'ol swissy and started hacking it down to size to fit underneath the cunfuddled car. Getting dangerously close to the puddle I shoved the can under letting the light yellow liquid fill the hacked up gas can. The flow began to slow until it dripped in the nearly full red container. Getting annoyed at myself I back tracked. Ok, what the hell did I hit? Something big enough and strong enough to rip through my gas tank, because this flipping car is not old enough to have rusted through a gas tank already… Bloody car.

I pulled out my special edition tattooed pink with white flower Razr and flipped the gal open. No signal. 'NO SIGNAL?! Stupid T-Mobile, when the hell was my contract over again? Oh yea, two years. Shit. Ok, think, think, think, think, think, ow… ' I heard a noise off to my left. Creepy! I ducked behind my car watching intently. I stood slowly and peered over the silver roof.

"Hello? Is any one there?" I asked into the trees. Maybe they only speak Spanish, this wouldn't be my first time encountering this in So Cal. "Che! Alguien estan?" At that moment a squirrel graced my presence. Freaking out from its sudden appearance I jumped up onto the car. Laughing at myself I relaxed, crossing my legs and sitting atop of my car I began to think.

A faulty gas tank isn't such a big deal, I walk until I get signal or find someone who can lend me theirs call my friend for a ride, call a tow truck, and take it to a shop. Sure it meant one less pair of shoes but.. Oh well. Ok, so now which way to walk?

I had been driving a good 20 minutes in this here direction.. I wasn't much inclined to walk that far. But who knew how much further it would be until I stumbled across another human being going the way I was going. But I had a good hankerin' that this was a drive way to someone rich, maybe famous! Oooo! All the more reason to go this way! I just prayed it wasn't Mel Gibson's house, I saw that episode of South Park!

Ten Minutes Later

Still no signal, and my Havaianas were starting to make my feet sore. No human life either. A lot of squirrels though. The path was getting definably narrower starting to disprove my idea that this was a driveway of sorts. Up ahead I saw a clearing and heard shouts. Whoo hoo! Finally some life! I started to run and hop from log to log to get through this thick forest to the people. My stupid flip flop got caught up on a branch and I stumbled and tripped into the clearing with a bang as my body bounced off the ground and skidded into a dirt turn around in front of a ginourmous house/mansion. I never could tell the difference, especially when my face was getting thrashed about by my klutziness.

As luck would have it, my face broke my fall and I was face down in pebbles. I mumbled curses in a choice of three or four of the languages I knew trying to prop myself up on one elbow. Spitting out the pebbles and digging one out of my nose ("Now how did you get up there?") I shook my head as I heard foot steps coming towards me. I looked up at what appeared to be a man in a wig. "Oh god, I did end up at Mel's house!" I exclaimed falling back on my face.

So there she was! Chapter One! How boring I am, I can't aspire to be anything better, no self worth and all!! Plus I have big shoes to fill if you ever read Rachel and Vicki's stories PH 1, 2, & 3! I give them honorable mention!


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Don't own anything, feeling kinda lonely here! I don't own anything or anyone… Well… I won't mention that one guy who may or may not be in my basement… Speaking of, how long has it been since I fed him… K umm, gotta go!!

Chapter Two: It's a corset of course!

I didn't think I had hit my head that hard. I'd never passed out in my entire life and I didn't plan to start now. Mumbling to the people surrounding me I tried to get my bearings.

"Quick! Don't let me fall asleep! I could have a concussion! Ask me questions! What is my name? Where do I live? What is my Credit Card number? No wait, hold on, not a good idea to give that one out… How many fingers am I holding up?!" I bellowed looking bewildered holding up three fingers.

"Please Mel! Don't make me watch one of your movies!" I was almost in tears and covering my face with my arms at the thought of this when I finally calmed down and took a deep breath.

"Miss? Please calm yourself!" I heard a brit saying in an oddly old fashioned dialect. 'Oh god it's my old Soccer coach! Why the hell is he wearing a wig? Better question, why the hell is he at Mel's house wearing a wig?' I sat up with his hand grasping my arm. Apparently I wasn't bleeding too badly because I could still see some… SOME… skin.

"Watch that last step, it's a doozey!" I warned dusting off my hunter green Henley top and khaki capris. My top was torn in a few dozen places, and my pants across my right thigh. My legs looked like that one scene in Saw, well more like all the scenes in Saw. I stumbled up to my feet and finally looked up at my surroundings. I slumped back to the floor instantly.

A huge Victorian house stood tall and proud in front of me. The house went well with the servant that had been assisting me, and even better with the horse and carriage in the back ground. The maids were whispering to themselves about this 'odd girl in strange clothing' and the huge French doors in the front of the house were opening to reveal a man dressed in full on Colonial Governor garb, wig and all. 'What's up with the wigs? I want one! Can I have one? Or maybe a big hat!'

"What is going on here?" the Governor asked with a soft voice without anger or impatience, "Is that young lady hurt badly? You! Servant send for the doctor!" He exclaimed pointing to a young boy about my age.

"Oh!" I said in realization, "No, Sir, please! I'm fine, just a few bumps and bruises, I can walk this off!" I said getting up and limping about in a circle with a fake transparent smile on my face. "I really didn't mean to interrupt your movie shoot."

That is when the carriage door opened and a slender blonde woman stepped out in a full, fluffy, frilly, fruity… well it was the color of a banana… Victorian dress. I recognized her face instantly. Keira Knightly. 'OMG, I was on the shooting of the pirates movie! Quick look about for Depp, maybe if a fane horrible injury I can demand a meeting with him as compensation! I'm evil and manipulative!' I started thrashing my head one way and the other. No sexy older man that could be my dad Depp in sight. Damn!

"I didn't know that the final Pirate movie was being filmed at Mel's house!" I said still in a bit of a daze.

"Governor Swann, I do believe that this woman is mad, or has hit her head a bit too hard." The man holding my arm keeping me partially standing said.

"I'm starting to think it's not the latter of the two." I said looking up at him with 'deer in the headlights eyes'. "One question," I said turning to Knightly, "What is your name?" She looked puzzled at this, I was relieved for a moment before she spoke.

"My name is Elizabeth Swann, daughter of Governor Swann, don't you know? Or are you not from Port Royal?" She answer sweetly.

'Ding, Ding, Ding!' Round three and I was out for the count. Remember how I said I wasn't about to start passing out… well I lied.

Some amount of time later

Mmm, I love the feel of fluffy sheets in the morning! But wait, my sheets at home weren't fluffy.. They were more scratchy and torturous… but really stylish. No these sheets were not mine, and that is when I began to wonder what had happened the night before. I gave up drinking in Spain, but I really felt like I had taken it up again.

I rolled over to look out the window, there I saw the open sea. Wow, the sun rise on the sea was amazing, the glint off the ocean was nearly blinding.

"Hold on a tick!" I said sitting up whacking my head on the head board. "Ow, son of a b…" The sun never rose on the Pacific ocean in California. This was my reasoning to have reasoning to be questioning the reasoning position of the sun on said questioned ocean. In other words, it was a teensy bit odd.

"Miss are you alright?" A small voice came from the corner. I turned to see a maid sitting by the fireplace cleaning out the ashes from the night before.

"I would be if I would stop hitting my head." I sighed to myself rubbing the goose egg forming atop my head.

"I've put some proper clothes out for you when you are ready, a dresser will come in and help you." She said giving me a courteous smile and rising from the ashes. I couldn't help thinking of Cinderella.. Erm, dresser?

Nodding I stood up, a bit woozy, and off balance but not as bad as I had felt that one time in Morocco, long story, tell you later. The maid exited and I remained behind as a flood of memories came back to me. The last hour before I was unconscious more specifically, my fifth birthday didn't come up, another long story, tell you later.

Wow, how _did_ that pebble get up there?

There was a small knock at the door, what I was assuming was the 'dresser'… yippee. I looked down at my tattered clothes and figured fitting in wouldn't be so hard once I got myself some decent threads. I finally pieced together what was happening and figured I would go with the flow until I woke up from the coma. I hoped. Ah yes, back to the knocking.

"Erm.. You may enter…" I said awkwardly flitting across the room to the door. In walked two maids I assumed were there to 'dress' me. I do not swing that way kids, trust me! Ok, once, in Morocco, but I told you I would tell you later…stop prying! You readers are a greedy lot.

The two curtsied to me, which I (a bit off balance) returned. They scuttled past me and picked up a box which they then opened to reveal a stunning gown.. erm.. dress. It was burgundy with cream colored trimmings, and a pearl embroidered bodice. I marveled at it for a few seconds until they pulled out something which laced up in the back.

"May I ask what that is?" I questioned pointing at the off white torture device.

"Why, It's a corset of course Miss." The stouter maid replied. My face twisted in a look of horror as they approached me with the corset.

What seemed like hours later

I had my blonde tresses secured loosely so some hair would fall about my face, and a bit down my neck. My, eh hem, bosoms were being showed off a teensy bit too much, but I was a little more preoccupied with the fact I couldn't breath. The maids escorted me down into the foyer were Knightly.. I mean Elizabeth.. I mean Miss. Swann was obviously waiting for me. She smiled sweetly at me as I huffed my way towards her.

"Any tricks on how I'm supposed to breath in this thing?" I asked her hiding my face behind my fan. She gave me a sly look and replied.

"Say you must use the loo, and take it off then." She said smiling taking a big breath in and walking towards the door. "As daughter of the Governor of Port Royal I wish to befriend you, and show you around our lovely little settlement." She said meekly.

"Or, in other words, your father wants to find out weather or not I'm a Pirate." I said gulping in air. "I'm not. But I swear if this thing doesn't come off soon I would rather hang in the gallows like them." Elizabeth looked a little shocked at what I said but quickly ushered me towards the carriage.

Once in the carriage she began unfastening the dress for me, and quickly took off the corset and helped me fasten the dress up once again. I started to laugh as she stuck her head out the window and looked about for any passer by, and when the coast was clear she promptly threw the corset into the bushes.

"I've lost so many good corsets that way." I joked. Elizabeth and I threw ourselves into a fit of giggles until we could hear the driver up top loudly clear his throat.

"I'm terribly sorry," Elizabeth began sitting upright again, "I never asked your name." I stopped mid breath to think of a good answer. Ok, I already told her I wasn't a pirate, so I really can't go down that alley… sad really, being a pirate would suite me. Um, what is next… hell with it, the truth should work.

"My name is Alissa Duke." I replied nodding as if trying to convince myself. Elizabeth gave me an off look.

"Duke? Odd surname to be sure." She said quirking an eyebrow.

MAYDAY MAYDAY! TRUTH IS NOT WORKING, SIR WE ARE GOING DOWN! FIRE THE CANNONS! LIE LIE LIE!

"Did I say Duke? I meant, Duchess… Duchess Alissa of Greenland!" I proclaimed.

WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING! IF SHE KNOWS HER GEOGRAPHY AT ALL SHE WOULD KNOW THAT GREENLAND IS ALL ICE, IT'S ICELAND THAT'S GREEN, TOCHE VIKINGS, YOU'VE WON THIS TIME!

Silently I waited for her to call me out, the whole time hoping that Greenland hadn't been discovered yet, or that hoping, nay praying that she was as stupid as she was fun. God really has my back sometimes.

"Royalty?" She gasped, "We had no idea! Begging your pardon Duchess! If we have had any idea…" Oh my, she was as dumb as a stick, pretty ones always are. I held up a hand.

"Really Miss Swann, it is no problem. It isn't like Greenland has a huge stake in the worlds future." I snickered to myself, I had no idea how to act like a Duchess. All I could do was make it up, and do my own thing, saying it was customary in Greenland. Like I said before, I'm very manipulative, and crafty.

"My brother, The King of Greenland, isn't the brightest flame in the chandelier." Thinking of my own older brother, I didn't feel too bad saying this, because it was not far off from the truth. Although I got a pang of jealousy from the fact that in my coma he got to be king. Jerk.

Elizabeth still seemed a little shell shocked and was eyeing me carefully. I guess she went from believing me to being very skeptical in a matter of moments. Time to put on my ol' charm that could make anyone do or believe anything I say.

"And how exactly did you come to, um, stumble into Port Royal?" She asked propping her shoulders back. I liked her so far, but she was starting to get pompous here and I could feel a cat fight coming on if I didn't smooth this out.

Think, think, think, ah ha! "Pirates." I said, "And Miss Swann, It seems we are pulling near to the village, town, erm, settlement… dwellings? And I would much rather leave this story for later when I may explain it to your father also." I tried to play off the 'used to getting my way' look. Come on, sell it with your eyes, come on, sell it!

"I understand Duchess, shall we?" She said motioning to the door that was being held open for us.

"Please, I much prefer you call me Liss." I said stepping lightly out of the carriage.

"And I, Elizabeth." She said smiling at me. Ah, the tension was relieved! We were back to being on good terms. Well at least we would be for a short while, because there in front of us was the blacksmith work shop. Ooo, the fun begins.

Ok, my pretties! What did you think? Ok little history lesson. Vikings named Greenland that so their enemies or who ever they wanted to pull a good prank on would go there expecting it to be nice, but it would be ice, and they would die. Hahaha, silly Vikings, such jokesters they are. I used my own name for this character because, well, it's a good name. And I couldn't think of anything else… So after all, I do own something… My name!


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own anything, anyone, or anywho… well except me. But anything can be bought for a price, any bidders? I can't do much, except sleep and type. I can't even walk anymore on account I sprang my knee and have been on my back for seven days… ouch, I set myself up for that one! Captain Sparrow, and Captain Morgan had something to do with that incident! Damn rum! On with the story!

Chapter Three: Oh my, royalty!

And there it was staring me right in the face. Brown eye. Haha, sorry, Brown's Smithy shop. I knew inside was Bloom, erm, William. And although I wasn't an Orlie fan anymore, I knew that If I were to see him in person, I would drool, and become a bit hysterical. Also the fact that I knew Will and Elizabeth's secret feelings for each other would only make it that much awkward. I turned to Elizabeth who was also sneaking peeksies at the shop, she promptly noticed my gaze and blushed.

"So, Elizabeth, shall we go in? I've never been into a Black Smiths shop before." I said wiggling my eyebrows.

"I should hope not!" She said giving me a look, "Hardly a place for royalty. Or a lady." She said, almost trying to convince herself.

"We are young, rich, and only have one life to live." I said knowing her weak spot, "We should live everyday like an adventure!" And Elizabeth was like putty in my hands! I said ONCE in MOROCCO! Lay off!

"Fine, but we have to ditch the driver." She said nodding her head towards our escort. Ha! So easy for me! I'm a master of deceit! I nodded to Elizabeth.

"Leave it to me!" I said assuring her with a wink.

I turned to the driver putting on my fox face. You know, the tilted head the heavy eye lids, the 'I look almost stoned but so sexy look'. I approached the young buck flaunting what I could in a 30 pound dress. I fluttered my fan on my neck and chest and stopped a bit too close for comfort in front of him. Leaning towards him I whispered a wonderful little line from my favorite show I learned a while back.

"Excuse me, what is your name?" I asked in a husked yet silky voice making him swallow a little. I heard a small gasp from behind me which could only be Elizabeth being shocked. I smiled parting my lips a little waiting for his reply.

"J-Jeremy Miss." He replied starting to sweat a little.

"Ah, Jeremy, Could you do me a favor Jeremy?" I said pulling back pretending not to notice him stare at my chest as I pulled a long blonde hair off the bodice of the dress, and then running a finger along my collar bone. "Could you move the carriage out of the sun? If it stays in the sun too long the seat gets hot," at this I stopped and fluttered my fan a little making my hair dance around my face, "and then my thighs get all pink and sweaty." I said batting my eyelashes. Within seconds he was sitting atop the carriage taking it to park it in the shade some ways away.

Turning around to see Elizabeth try and hold in her laughter I smiled. "Don't hold it in dear, It causes cancer." I said laughing myself at the confused look on her face. "We better vamos before he comes back." I said striding over to the black smiths.

Mere seconds later

I opened the door to the Smithy shop and walked in, Elizabeth hesitantly followed me. What hit me first was the smell of coal, and hot metal, also a present the mule had left over to my right. A faint odor of rum wafted over to me reminding me of Mr. Brown himself. Joy.

"The Shop is closed today to the public, please come back tomorrow." I heard a soft British voice say to us. Wills back was facing us, but I could already feel the butterflies fluttering around in my stomach. I'm sure Elizabeth was feeling the same way.

"I should hope we aren't public!" Elizabeth said smiling. Will promptly turned around and turned five different shades of red and slightly bowed in apology to each of us in turn.

"Eliza-, Miss Swann, I-I'm sorry I-I had no idea!" Will stammered, gaining composure he walked over to us to bow properly. At this point I was about to squeal and jump him. Calm down lassie! Calm yourself, you'll have your moment to make him your puppet!

"I'm sorry, I don't believe we've had the pleasure of meeting." He said taking my hand about to kiss it. Elizabeth squeaked in protest stopping him.

"Will, this is DUCHESS Alissa of Greenland!" Elizabeth said which in turn made Will drop my hand and bow deeply. DAMN YOU ELIZABETH HOW DARE YOU USE THAT RULE AGAINST ME!

"Oh my! Royalty?" Ah, the slurred rantings of an old drunk smithy! Well, he was sitting down in his chair a drink, and promptly decided to pass out. Man, that must be some good rum. Good night Brown eye!

"Duchess Alissa! I'm afraid this humble black smith shop is no place for someone such as yourself." Will said trying to wipe the grime from his face. I laughed openly at his statement. Time to sell it!

"Any place I like is a suitable place for me!" I said putting my chin in the air. Sell it with your eyes! Just then there was a knock and a holler at the front door of the driver obviously not being fooled by our hiding spot. "Erm, well any place except this place we gotta escape!" I said grabbing up my skirts and jumping off the foyer ledge and running over to the back door, hoping and dodging everything in the way. Will and Elizabeth's mouths were a tad agape at my behavior.

"Haha, I um, ran track and played basketball in high school!" I said shrugging as they both quickly made their ways to the back doors.

"Miss Swann, Duchess Alissa, I hardly think this is suitable behavior for two young ladies as yourselves." Will commented while opening the back door for us to pass.

I turned to Will narrowing my eyes at him. "William Turner is it?" I asked not waiting for a reply, "Why is it that Elizabeth and I must bend to the station of our birth? Why aren't we allowed to indulge in things anyone may because we have to put on a face of propriety? Back home in Greenland.." oh god what was I saying, I've lost it… " In Greenland I set examples for the young girls to follow because all people, men, woman, peasants, people of color, old people, sick people, any people, even black smiths are still people! No one is better or lesser than any other person in this world… except Barbossa." I mumbled the last bit to myself.

That is when I saw it, in Will's face, something changed when he looked at me, and Elizabeth noticed this change also, and gave me a look. Oh boy, I start drama in my own coma!

Make up your own amount of time that has passed between one minute and ten

We were now walking along the docks and I was breathless at the sight of the mountains and ships pulling in to port. I could see the Dauntless, looking, well Dauntless, and there was the Interceptor, well 'Lady Washington' hanging out. And of course there was Murtog and Mullroy. And, oh my god, It was Mr. Captain Jack Sparrow.

"Elizabeth?" I asked looking at her, "Is today a special day for a Mr. James Norrington?" Realization dawned on her face. "Too late now love, might as well miss it all together." I said waltzing up to the three men on the dock.

"Alissa!" Will called after me. Elizabeth started following me, and Will her. Closing in I heard the two red coats squabbling about the black pearl while Depp, Sparrow, erm, Captain snuck on board. I immediately followed suit.

"Need some help commandeering this boat? Ship!" I correct walking up the stairs to the wheel. "Captain Jack Sparrow?" I said raising an eyebrow. He returned my face, swishing about in his normal seeming to be drunk state peering at me intently.

Quirking a grin, Sparrow said calmly, "That's interesting."

Ok! Chapter three short, but I'm not sure how to make it longer, I think this is a good place we've come to. Yes if you have any problems, write it on a piece of paper, crumple it up and flush it down the toilet! My mole people will promptly deliver it to my head quarters here. Thanks kiddies!****


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: It's mine! Mine!! All mine!! Sigh, no it isn't, if it was this would be called a 'claimer'. Well…on with the show, story, short showy story!

Chapter Four: He's a Pirate?!

So there I was standing on the Interceptor. Feet from the notorious pirate, Jack Sparrow…Captain, sorry! He was eyeing me cautiously, and I him, well I for more lecherous reasons.

"And who might you be lass?" He asked closing in on me. I wasn't nervous, because anything he had in mind he wanted to do with me I was all gung-ho for!

"Duchess Alissa of Greenland." I said calmly trying to keep my composure. Not working.

"Greenland ey?" He asked toying with his braided goatee. How I wish I was that goat hair on his chin.

"Hey you! We told you this ship is off limits to civilians!" The quirky couple in red bellowed running up the gangplank onto the ship.

"Sorry, it's just such a pretty boat…ship!" Sparrow corrected.

"And who are you?" the chubbier of the two asked pointing his rifle at me. Much scarier in person I assure you.

"Eep!" I exclaimed jumping back from the barrel making the two a tad more attentive to my actions. Suddenly Jack grabbed my hand ushering me behind him.

"She's no one you need be concerning yourselves over." Jack said pointing a cautioned finger at the two.

"Men! Lower your arms now! Captain Norrington would not like to hear you two go about your duties threatening young ladies!" Elizabeth said marching up between the two and Jack and I. "Especially a Duchess!" a groan escaped me, why was I so stupid as to tell her that? This was going to be a hard rouse to keep up.

"Miss Swann! Begging your pardon miss!" They said nodding to her, "Are you acquainted with these two?" The smaller but more dopey one asked.

"The lady behind the man that you are pointing the gun at is the sister of the King of Greenland! So if you do not want to lose your station in life I suggest you lower your weapons!" Elizabeth said sternly. Wow she could really get the job done if she wanted to!

I took my time behind Jack to examine him from behind, strong shoulders, nice dreads, great back, and oh my, what a wonderful…

"But Miss! We have good reasoning that this man is a fugitive of the law!" they rebutted. Hehe, butted…

"Great reasoning!" I chirped over said fugitive's shoulders, he wasn't but half a head taller than me.

"What was that lass? Ye be trying to call me out?" He said smirking a bit towards me.

"It's Liss, not lass, thanks!" I said smacking him on the back making him fall forwards a bit sending the two red coats into a flurry of a panic.

"He is no fugitive! He's a Pirate!" I exclaimed smiling at him, "A Captain Jack Sparrow!"  
"THE Captain Jack Sparrow, Duchess." Jack said smiling out right, "Interesting, that you know so much about me." He said turning towards me. The sound of metal being un sheathed got my attention. Oh William, don't tell me that… Yup, you would.

I saw Will pointing the cutlass, horrible name, at the Captains back. Shoot, think Alissa! This is all your fault, you have to do something, remember, remember… fencing lessons, after piano before French. Scanning the deck frantically all I could find was Sparrow's sword. Oh well.

I grabbed Sparrow's sword, oh! My I'm a dirty girl, and pushed Jack out of the way. Needless to say he was a tad bit surprised, and so was Will. Quickly he lowered his weapon and gave me a quizzical look.

"Let's just say that I'm willing to fight all three of you to protect this man." I said surprising myself, but I decided a while ago that this was my coma and it was time to take charge and take what I wanted, I'm so evil!

"'Fraid I can't be having that luv," Jack said coming up behind me taking the cutlass from my white knuckle grip, "You see they have the bang bang's, we only have the clang clang's." Despite myself I couldn't help but laugh at his explanations. Once the cutlass was in his possession two rifles and a blade were pointed at the Captain.

Sheathing his own blade he put his arms up in a kind of mock surrender. "By the way, thanks lass for getting me into this mess." He said throwing me a look, you know the look I'm talking about.

"I tried to help," I said winking. "But…"

Just then I noticed him twitching his hand towards his one shot pistol, oh poor Jack was he getting desperate, or was he going to point it at my…

"Jack I swear if you point that confounded thing at my head I will kick you so hard you will…eep!" I heard the click of a gun cocking, and quickly got in front of Jack so he could play his little game to escape, until I heard the bang I was calm. Standing there stone cold my heart beating fast, my adrenaline pumping I heard a scream, and a few shouts.

Suddenly I felt strong arms envelope me, and help me sink to the ground, I looked up at Jack as Elizabeth and Will ran up towards me. Bewildered at why I was having a hard time standing I gave a pathetic questioning look to Jack.

"You've been shot luv, in me place." Jack said looking concerned. Shot? I didn't feel anything, of course not this is my coma, I have control over what happens here! Ok, quickly think of what you want to happen next. Umm, I am miraculously better, and me and Jack sail away together on this here ship.

Pain, lots of pain started to fill my left upper arm. Why pain? I didn't want pain…I didn't ask for this! I started to get frantic, the sting of my arm was blocking everything else from my brain. Jack ripped off the left arm of my dress and started tearing it into strips.

"How could you?" Cried Elizabeth to the dopier of the two guards. "I will see you punished fully for this!" she exclaimed exasperated. I blinked blankly at her form as it began to get fuzzy, was I passing out again or just crying? I felt the hot wetness on my face as I looked at Jack who was feverishly tending to my wound.

Crap he saw me cry! I don't want pity! Oh well, here comes the pity train pulling into station, chuga chuga whoot whoot!

"No worries luv, just a scratch, you'll be back to defending random pirates in no time." He said giving me a toothy gold grin. I side glanced at my wound, it was small but deep, bleeding profusely but no bullet lodged in my dainty flesh. The shock had worn off and the throbbing commenced.

"You, whelp, go below deck and fetch us some rum!" Jack directed at Will. I nodded so Will would stop looking so idle and helpless, not a good look for him.

"Now is no time for you to be drinking Captain." I said laughing a little making myself wince. Jack gave me a weary look but suddenly got a serious face. Hehe, so cute, his serious face!

"How is it you know so much about me lass?" He questioned keeping pressure on the gouge in my arm. I smiled up at him.

"Ah but who doesn't know about the infamous Captain Jack Sparrow? Making a deal with Davy Jones himself to raise the great Black Pearl from the depths to be Captained by you for a total of thirteen years. Only to go hunting for cursed Aztec gold and be thrown on a tiny island to watch your first mate Barbossa sail away with your coveted Pearl. And now you have naught more than a magical compass that points to what you want so dearly, and the title of Captain. At least you do not share in that curse. Pirate Lord." I said smiling doing my best at a pirate accent the whole time. Man, even with the dull pain my arm had become I sure enjoyed toying with his mind.

"I've got the rum!" Will said emerging from below deck.

"Bout time!" Jack said grabbing the rum, uncorking it and taking a long swig, "And now it's your turn enchantress." Jack said dumping some rum on my wound. That is when two realizations hit me, this pain was for real, and this was no coma.

Chapter Four is done! Well so far, I have had a mild concussion, a pebble up my nose, a corset crushing my ribs, almost got into a sword fight with William, and I've been shot! Hope my pain and misery entertains you! Hope you guys liked it, I like packing a lot of action into my first meetings. I guess this is no boring trip for my comrades with the fake duchess of Greenland… hmm ice queen, I like the sound of that! Anyway if you didn't like it, I just have to say this, I didn't force you to read this, I didn't hold a cutlass to your neck!


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I do not own Potc, nor will I ever, I do own the story, but not like anyone wants to lay claims to it. Sad really. 

Chapter Five: The frightful story of Duchess Alissa of Greenland.

The wound had stopped bleeding and since I didn't lose massive amounts of blood I figured if I had a cookie and some juice I would be ok. At least that is what they tell you when you give blood. And I had given blood to the ship, to Jack, and to my dress.

Once patched up, Jack had left me to sit with Elizabeth and Will while the two red coats fretted about what they were going to do now that they had shot royalty. Poor saps. Jack was standing by the helm and eyeing me cautiously as if I was about to put a spell on him. I guess my little bout of verbal vomiting made him uneasy. I should really learn when to shut up.

No one was moving due to the fact of shock, and I was still trying to cope with the fact that this wasn't a coma and I had some bigger problems to deal with now. The clicking of many, many boots towards us got our attention and broke the silence the last ten minutes had been. Everyone tensed, except Jack who was squinting out at the ocean. Ever so on guard huh?

Governor Swann and Commodore Norrington with five plus red coats marched up the gang plank to join our little party. First thing they noticed was Jack, he is kind of hard to miss. Second thing they noticed, first thing they missed, was me, a bloody wreck.

"Men ready your arms!" Norrington said while the clank around him signaled they were doing just that. Jack spun around at this finally taking note of their presence. "Miss, are you all right?" Norrington asked to me finally noticing Elizabeth, and her present company of Mr. Turner. I stood up, stumbled a bit from being light headed, caught my balance, and stood tall and proud. I knew what was going to happen to Jack once Will opened his big trap so I decided that this was the time to finally do something useful for the poor 'ol Captain.

"It is Duchess." I said rather haughtily. "And yes, I am fine thanks to this fine man here." I said pointing to Jack. He pointed to himself a little surprised and got a goofy grin about his face.

"Well, I have been known to save lives, in Singapore they call me somewhat of a miracle man." He said prancing over to my side to put an arm around me which I quickly slapped away.

"Yes, well," Norrington said a bit confused and disgruntled he wasn't going to get to shoot the odd looking new comer, "Erm, Duchess, is it? Who did this to you?" Ah, the question of real importance. I was amazed the shit storm I had sailed myself into, batten down the hatches men, its going to be a long ride.

"I did." I said calmly. Taking note of their confused and somewhat doubtful faces, hoping that all five of them would keep their pie holes shut, especially Jack. I continued. "See, I wished to come aboard this fine vessel and these two fantastic soldiers obliged and took me on a little tour. Well, I was admiring a fire arm when it accidentally fired grazing my arm. And Captain Sparrow," I said this pointing to Jack now, "well he saw the whole thing and came aboard to help bandage me up!" I said finally pointing to the bandage.

The two red dopes, Elizabeth and William were staring at me unbelievably, whilst Jack cleaned his fingernails in a futile attempt. "Is that so?" Norrington questioned to the rest of them who were on the ship. The Murtogg and Mullroy nodded frantically, Elizabeth and Will nodded reluctantly.

"Good! Now that this is all straightened out, I guess I will be off, have so many important matters to deal with!" Jack said strolling towards the gangplank but to his dismay none of the men moved, well the Governor did dodge behind Norrington.

"Don't let him go Commodore! He's a Pirate!" William exclaimed, bitter emphasis on the word 'pirate'. Jack then pointed to himself a bit confused and gave a shotty look to Will as he turned to give a toothy grin to the Commodore. I rolled my eyes at Will who just looked at me and shrugged.

"Shoot him!" the Governor said in his unusually high pitched girly voice. Déjà freaking vu. Ok, time to sell it with more than just your eyes.

"STOP!" I waltzed in front of Sparrow arms spread wide as if daring them to shoot me. Jack thankfully crouched behind me. I sighed rolling my eyes at his behaviors which got a rise out of some of the soldiers. "This man has saved my life on numerous occasions!" I lied… actually really he was more or less the reason bad things were happening to me progressively more frequently.

"I did what now lass?" Jack whispered into my ear curiously. I kept my smile plaster on as I warned him to shut up, lips barely moving. I'm so glad that I practiced ventriloquism as a kid.

"He did what now?" everyone said in unison looking curiously at me. Man, tough crowd.

"They don't even know you and they don't trust you!" I said giving Sparrow a look.

"Occupational hazard luv." He said apologetically. I smiled, good Old Jack…erm, Captain. I glared at the Commodore. "It is a long story that I don't intended on telling until your men lower their weapons!" I growled which seemed to work, because they lowered their weapons without orders from their leader. Hell hath no fury like a woman's scorn!

"Ok, so here it goes…" I took a deep breath and began a long, long tale.

Half hour later

"…and then they made me their chief." I said with a finality. Jack gave me a quirky look and everyone but the Commodore was intrigued with my story. Mr. Norrington sighed and gave me a look.

"Yes, that's lovely and all, but that still doesn't explain how this man has saved your life on numerous occasions, and thus doesn't deserve to hang in the gallows." as if snapped out of a trance the Governor shook his head in agreement.

"Oh that," I said, telling the other story had given the left side of my brain a chance to come up with a really good story, so here I went, trying to navigate through this storm of shit that had become my afternoon. "Well, back home in Greenland…" This was going to be hard to judge, maybe these guys knew Greenland was a big patch of ice… I stopped there and waited.

"Well go on!" Norrington urged. Oh thank heavens!

"Back home in Greenland there was a civil war about to break out, and my brother wanted to make sure that I would be safe, he wanted me to go to the other side of the country in the hills so that if anything happen to him I would still be alive to rule and govern." Wow, that sounds pretty damn good. Ok what next, what next…"I was traveling with my personal soldiers and servants, when we were ambushed by the coast by a band of blood thirsty pirates," cue watery eyes, stop, choke back some tears… ah, thank you drama 110... Jack handed me a hanky which I took to help cover the smile that was sprawling across my face. I looked up through red eyes to see all the men looking sympathetic.

"After they brutally slaughtered all of my comrades, and I had been exhausted from the battle, they tied me up and took me back to their ship, where I was locked in a cabin for three days. They were rebels planning to use my life to over throw the government and take control." Stop, get scared look in eyes, good, now cry a little bit, good.  
"We had been close to the capital of Nuuk when they dragged me out on deck to show they had kidnapped me to the people of my country. Holding a knife to my throat they threatened to kill me if the rebels didn't get control. I was the most precious and well liked person of court in my country and to them, losing me, would be like losing hope. I couldn't let that happen. I demanded a meeting with my brother, but before we could meet, another pirate ship, one waving an odd Jolly Rodger not native to our region came along side and started to attack." I looked at Jack who was studying me closely, obviously impressed.

"They overtook the ship I was on, and this man," I said pointing to Jack, "Fought to get me to safety back on his ship, before the rest of his crew had to retreat. We sailed for days trying to escape the rebel ship, finally we lost them in a storm towards the south of the Americas, unfortunately the storm left the ship in a bad state. She started to take on water, and after four days of us slowly sinking, we finally had to abandon ship." I got a scared look in my eyes as Jack quirked an eyebrow at me. "For two long and miserable days we were in the long boat drifting, until the rebel pirates caught up with us, destroying the long boat. Jack"

"Captain…" Jack corrected, I rolled my eyes at him.

"Captain Jack swam to my rescue, helping me on atop a bit of drift wood we then were afloat for hours until we spotted land. Once on land we began to search for any life, we got separated in the woods and I stumble into Governor Swann's front yard." I finished.

Everyone stood there looking at the two of us like we were aliens, I was hoping they were buying my story, and Jack's hand was twitching for his gun again, which of course was a bad sign. I soon nudged him so he wouldn't even think about it. We both stood there smiles across our faces.

"That explains why he has saved your life, and why you are here, but it doesn't explain why he was 'rescuing' you in the first place." Norrington pointed out. Damn I knew I forgot something… shoot.

"I can explain that." Jack said getting close to the Commodore.

"Do indulge us." the Governor piped up.

"Well, seeing as pirates aren't the best liked sort o' people…" Jack stopped as he heard an 'Oh really?' from me. "Now be a good lass," He directed at me. Crossing my arms I let him continue. "I was counting on a handsome reward for savin' the little lass, and maybe gettin' meself some sort of safe haven if I needed it." Jack said winking at Norrington.

"And I have granted him clemency. So if you wish to shoot him you will be starting a turmoil between our two great monarchs." I added knowing Jacks answer wasn't a very good one.

"Very well." the Governor said in a tone of defeat. Williams mouth was agape, Elizabeth looked like someone had just shot her dog, and Norrington had a look of determination on his face. Since this isn't a coma, I'm going to have to really start watching my head and health here.

I looked at Jack who looked at me smiling like he just got away with a cookie before dinner. "Oh Jack you'll ruin your appetite." I said, realizing I said something I should have been thinking instead of saying out loud. I turned every shade of red while my stomach growled. Huh, subconscious is thinking about food… good subject change.

"How about some mutton? Anyone?" I offered…

"Mutton all around!" Jack said a bit too festive. Oh god this was going to be fun.

There she was the grand lie that is sure to unravel some time or another. Not a very good chapter I know, but I have lots of things to do, like rest up so my knee isn't forever messed up. Right? Right! It is boring now but it will get spicy later, promise!! Well until chapter six! TATA!


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: Don't own POTC. And my friend Shannon brought it to my attention that some people might think this is a self insert. Really, It's not, It is just first person POV. On with chapter six!

Chapter Six: Called out!

Dinner was an interesting event. To see the look of shock and disgust on the Governor's face that a pirate captain was dining in his house was priceless. MasterCard, you need to make a commercial about this! Elizabeth was very intrigued and kept asking Jack tons of questions which only added to her fathers irritability. I was quiet most of the time, except to giggle at the people around me. But whenever Jack's eyes fell upon me I would quickly busy myself with fixing the napkin on my lap, or straightening the silverware.

After dinner I retired back to my room from that morning. I was out of it, and the cut on my arm was starting to throb. Where was some Advil when you needed it? I slumped over onto the bed, there was a knock on my door which I figured was a maid wanting to come in and put one of those hot thingies in my bed. Well no siree, I am not home, go huff and puff at someone else's house!

"Lass, ye best be openin' this door before they hear me!" I heard the husked pirate voice come from the other side. Whoa, I had had daydreams about this before, but for it to really happen, I was erm, how do you say? Freaking the frick out! Frick on a stick! Ok calm down, just open the door. My hand hesitated for a moment and then I thrust the door open to see the pirate standing there leaning against the doorframe.

"Well?" I asked a tad bit too sarcastically. I heard footsteps coming up the stairs and I quickly grasped onto the V of his shirt and yanked him inside the room. Slamming the door and securing the lock I pressed my ear to the door. The footsteps came closer and closer, and then they stopped for a moment in front of my door, then they proceeded past. Sighing a bit relieved I noticed Jack sitting comfortably on my bed. Facing him I put my hands on my hips and glared at him.

Why am I glaring? I should be jumping him, ripping off his clothes, why are his clothes still on?! I tried to fix my expression to the fox look, but my face got stuck half way through and the end result was a look of deep thought.

"You alright luv?" Jack said concerned. Hmm, I must look constipated, damnit.

"Oh, yes, it's just my arm, it's starting to hurt." I said, which was close to the truth, really, I had been through worse. Like the time I sprang my knee at my 19th birthday party. Or the time I got a huge gouge in the back of my leg from a swimming pool ladder, or the time when I jammed my finger at basket ball practice junior year… well you get the picture.

Jack's eyes fell on my bare arms, which were bare because I decided to wear the tank top that was under my henley and my torn capris. I supposed that anyone else in this time frame would be embarrassed to see, or be seen in this type of clothing. But me being from 2007 and Jack being… well you know. His hand reached for my arm which I promptly jerked out of reach. Not on purpose, or that I didn't want him touching it, it just hurt. But I suppose that's not how he saw it.

"Oh, sorry." I said holding my arm out to him. He gave me a small smile and grabbed my wrist pulling me towards him. Six inches from his form I began to get a wee bit nervous. He untied the wrap around my wound and turned my arm this way and that in the fire light. Then he gingerly tied the tunicate back around my arm.

"Like I said, I think ye'll be back to defending random pirates soon enough." He said keeping a hold on my wrist. "Now I be havin' a few questions for you." I gulped which he must have taken for me being frightened because he released my wrist, but I didn't back up.

Stepping towards him and closing in the six inches between us, I bent forward and got close to his face narrowing my eyes. "And what would those questions be Captain?" I purred. His turn to gulp.

"I want to know who ye really be, and why ye be trying to save me life." Jack said a bit roughly. I cocked an eyebrow, a famous look of mine, and bent closer, making him lean back to avoid bumping heads with me.

"What is it to you? Shouldn't you be glad I saved your life, and escape to go off to find your precious pearl?" Oh, I was harsh. I stared into his dark brown eyes, letting my green ones try and bore into his thoughts. Blank. Yup figures.

Something changed in his expression. He grabbed my shoulders pushing me back, standing up he threw me down on the bed and crouching over me his hands pinning my arms down he smiled. "I know for certain you are no Duchess of Greenland. Unless you speak Danish you better start explaining why you seem to be such an expert on Ol' Jack!"

Needless to say I was surprised he knew Greenland's national language. I was also surprised how quick he was…and handsome. Why are his clothes still on?

"My real name is Alissa Duke, I'm from California, which I'm guessing doesn't even exists yet!" I said exasperated and a bit turned on. His grip loosened and he jumped up looking at me oddly.

"Fair enough." He said pacing, "But why ye be saving me life every thirty seconds?" He asked massaging is goat hair. On his chin! Dirty, dirty readers!

"Maybe I like you?" I offered, he scoffed at me, ok or not…

"You were shot, and you lied to everyone who be trustin' you. Ye be a pirate." He accused. I gave him a hurt look. "How long do you think it will be before they start questioning your word? A week, a month if ye are lucky." he said to me, I knew he was right, but at this point I was just trying to stay alive. I hadn't even formed a plan to get back yet.

"I'm not a pirate." I said standing up off the bed and walking towards the window. "I'm not a duchess." I said, turning back to him. Then I narrowed my eyes searching his face for some sort of escape… from what? From this mess? How did this happen, how could this happen. And why did it have to happen to me. I was terrified.

"Then who are you?" He asked raising his palms in the air.

"You want to know who I really am? Then come with me, I suppose I should show this to someone."

Such a short chapter! And its done! Just like that, end of story, end of everything! Haha, I lie I lie! There is much much more to come, this is just the begging! Brace yourselves because you are going to be shocked at the events that will unfold!


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I do not own POTC. But I own my character, and my name. Hard to fight in court you own someone else's name! Buwahahaha! Anyway, if you have stuck with me so far, you are a better person that those others that gave up after the first chapter, or …gasp… the first paragraph. Well I'm not good at catching people's attention, I just kinda hope they suffer through it and get to the good stuff!

Chapter Seven: The winds of change.

Climbing out a two story window is a lot harder than people in movies make it look. I'm so glad I had a balcony that outreached to my front deck and stairs to sneak out in my teenage years. Jack went first so if I fell he could point and laugh I supposed. But being agile as I am…cough gag cough… I made it without serious injury.

"What exactly are we looking for lass?" Jack asked as he followed me into the dark forest.

"My baby." I said smirking, how was he going to take that!

"Ye've left a baby out here all this time?" He asked.

"Well, my baby is special, he is made of leather and plastic, and weighs about a ton." I laughed.

"Big lad." Jack said following me through the maze of logs that were my demise on the way out. Now on the way back in I was a teensy bit more careful.

Ten Minutes Later

We had been on the trail for a few minutes when I saw the gleam of my car. Ah, beautiful car! Jack stopped a few paces away from the beastie and eyed it warily. I reached into my pocket and grabbed my keys and unlocked the front door. Crouching in I put the keys in the ignition and tried to start the bugger up. No gas in the pistons meant the engine wasn't going to turn over.

Shit! I was getting frustrated with the car. Maybe I could walk back to 2007. Haha, yea and leave my car I still owe payments on here? I wouldn't know if I would be able to come back. I looked under the car to find the gas can still in place with the gas still intact. Pulling the foul smelling liquid out I promptly opened my trunk removing a plastic bag to cover the gas up with. The last thing I need is watered down gasoline. I tied the bag off, and stored it behind the back wheel of my car so it wasn't too visible.

Turning my attention back to my trunk I found my green book bag filled with spare clothes incase I needed them. You know, if I spilled something on my clothes, got them dirty, spent the night at someone else's house for a few days… wink wink… or you know, GOT SENT TO PIRATES OF THE CARRIBEAN!

I grabbed my emergency makeup bag, with all my toiletries, and my dry cleaning consisting of a few cocktail dresses and a couple women's suits. I grabbed my laptop bag, my cell phone, and my MP3 player. Not an IPOD, do I look like I want cancer?

I heard a tapping on glass and looked to see Jack wide eyed at my car. Realizing I hadn't even said one word of explanation, I turned to say something to him.

"You are an enchantress!" he accused pulling the handle of my passenger door and jumping back as it willingly popped open. Laughing I pushed past him to check my glove box for my flashlight which we would need to walk back. Closing the door and trunk I waltzed over to Sparrow. I locked the car and leaned against the back end watching Sparrow look at me cautiously.

"Jack, I'm not an enchantress. I'm from a completely different part of the world that doesn't exists yet." I said waiting for him probe me for questions, ask me what I meant…basically I was just bracing myself for him to berate me with questions.

"Oh, alright then." He said walking back towards the trail, picking up two of my bags on the way. Flabbergasted I opened and closed my mouth resembling a fish in amazement. "Luv, I've seen and heard odder things than what ye are telling me." I watched him walk away with my bags in awe. It was going to take a lot to ruffle his feathers.

Next Morning

I woke up to the usual bustle around my room. Only this morning was a tad more frightening. Today was the day that I had to make a plan to get back home. It's not like the answer to my problems was going to show up at the house to give me a light bulb kind of idea.

Last night had ended up being uneventful. We climbed back into my room, Jack last tossing me up my bags, and me failing to catch a few of them, resulting on them coming back down and hitting him on the head. After he was back in the house I pushed him out of the room so I could change to go to bed.

I threw the covers off of me revealing my silk turquoise pajamas and ducky slippers. All the maids eyes were on me. I giggled and explained that jack had salvaged some of my things and returned them to me. Who cared if the maids believed me or not? Another maid came in telling me that Captain Jack Sparrow was outside the door and wanted to be let in, but of course she said that I was not presentable yet.

"Let him in." I said yawning. All the maids looked at me in shock. I rolled my eyes, "I'm not so modest!" I said in a 'don't dare second guess me because I can have you fired' kind of tone. Seconds later Jack was standing in the room while I was getting up out of bed.

"Mornin' lass." Jack said giving a toothy grin.

"Good morning, any reasoning to your visit?" I asked rummaging through my makeup bag looking for my tooth brush.

"I wanted to be the first to tell ye, that the whelp is here to see you." Jack said intrigued by his own news.

"Ah, the pirate killer wants an audience with the pirate defender." I laughed. All the maids had stopped working and were shocked that me and Jack were having such a laid back conversation considering the way I was dressed, and the fact that he was in my room to begin with.

"Seems that way." Jack said also rummaging around in my makeup bag after I had gotten up, I hope he didn't find and steal my eyeliner. I walked over to the pitcher of water, pouring a little into the basin I looked at myself in the mirror. I was a wreck, my hair, my makeup, I was getting a zit! Bloody Elizabeth doesn't have zits!

"You ladies can continue what you were doing, unless the presence of a pirate unnerves you, then you may leave." I said beginning to brush my teeth wondering why the hell Will had come to see me of all people. Crap, Jack found my eyeliner!

Half hour later

After refusing to be trapped in a corset and getting into a squabble with one of the maids I finally was able to convince them that I could get dressed on my own fine. Shooing the girls out of the room I was able to go through all of my clothing. Some of it too plain and inappropriate for this time era, and some of it too erotic for this time era also. Finally I found the perfect outfit.

Walking down the stairs I saw Jack and Will standing in uncomfortable silence. Will looked a tad bit mad, so I was guessing Jack had made some snide comment at his expense. Hope I didn't miss the eunuch joke yet. Both of their eyes fell on me when I came down the staircase.

My outfit consisted of blue jeans with fake patches of different prints, a little more worn down the front of the legs. I wore a long sleeved brown shirt that covered up half of my hands, which over the shirt I wore a few choice bracelets. Over the brown shirt I wore a worn hunter green colored short sleeved shirt with sparrows, and skulls and crossbones with hearts for eyes decorating down one of the sides. My hair was swept back into a tight pony tail, letting my curls loosely fall over my shoulder. My shoes were brown flats resembling ballet shoes. And my makeup heavy on the eyeliner, but using some gold shimmer on my cheek bones and on my eyes close to my eyebrow.

"Duchess you look…" Will began.

"Like a pirate." Jack finished happily.

"That wasn't my intention. I was going for more neo-pirate look." I said jingling my bracelets while waving my finger at him.

Just then Elizabeth appeared at the top of the stairs. Her expression was one of confusion as she saw us three of us prattling away.

"Will?" She questioned walking down the rest of the flight of stairs, "What are you doing here?" She asked, which I thought was kind of rude, but hey, it's not my house.

"I came to see how the Duchess' arm is coming along Miss Swann." William said with a hit of coldness of her name. He must have been offended by her rude comment.

Elizabeth's face got stone cold as she looked at me and what I was wearing. I smirked shrugging my shoulders.

"This is, um, customary garb in Greenland this time of year." I said a bit unconvinced of myself. Little did she know she would soon be wearing actual pirate garb, and become a pirate lord herself. Too quick to judge Elizabeth.

"Well got to go! Really must be touring Port Royal some more! Wonderful city!" Jack said turning about and walking out at the daggers that were being thrown by Elizabeth's eyes.

Horrible chapter, I know I promised they would get better, but I lied, I'm a horrid horrid person and I will throw myself in the brig personally! Next chapter some different POV come in, Norrington, Jack, and Will. Ta ta!


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: Don't, won't, and have never owned POTC. Huge props to those of you who review, you know who you are. And if you don't know then you aren't reviewing. I'm not a big stiffler on reviews, but I do like them. I'm only human!

Chapter Eight: Will and Liss' day out! Part I

Elizabeth was still throwing daggers with her eyes, and I was about to implode. Will was also looking uncomfortable. I cleared my throat a little. I didn't get why there was all the tension. I guess only they knew why, so if it is their problem why do I feel so uncomfortable. Odd.

…………WILL'S POV…………

This is rather uncomfortable. Elizabeth seems really upset. But after what had happened yesterday did she expect me to feel the same way I had for years? She had disregarded the feelings of others, rather un lady like. How was I to ask the duchess to join me today without having to invite Elizabeth also.

"Well, I should probably go Jack-a-lope hunting." the duchess exclaimed. Sometimes I really didn't understand what she was talking about, but that was part of her charm.

"I should accompany you. A lady shouldn't be walking alone this far out of town." I said hoping she would accept my offer this time.

"Especially dressed like that." Elizabeth seethed. The duchess began to laugh at this and nodded in agreement.

"True I'm dressed oddly, but at least I'm not nude!" At this I thought I was going to burst in flames of embarrassment to be present during this conversation.

"Well I have matters to discuss with my father, I hope you two have a pleasant afternoon stroll." Elizabeth said, always proper.

"And you have a pleasant afternoon chat!" replied the duchess, always a tad off. "Shall we?" She asked extending her arm to me. I couldn't help but smile as I took HER arm and SHE led me out of the door.

Further down on the road the duchess had taken to walking backwards as to face me so we could talk. I was always on edge when she seemed to stumble a little but caught herself. She seemed rather agile for her height.

"Tell me why you didn't retain your title of Princess?" I asked trying to turn the conversation off of the weather and on to her.

"Hmm, long story, how long is this road?" she asked laughing. I loved that laugh, it was so pure and unrestrained.

"Rather long." I replied hoping to coax the story out of her.

"Well, when my father passed on the crown to my brother once he got married I knew it was only a matter of time until he would have children. Now, once he did have children being third in line to the crown didn't merit much power. But if I decided to take on the title Duchess I could live as the most noble of noblewoman." she paused, "I really don't know what I'm talking about." she began to laugh. Her smile always made me smile, as much as I held back. She was so sincere so pure.

"How is your home land? Greenland?" I asked. She stopped her laughing and stopped walking. Her eye lost its twinkle and got a distant look to it. Her face fell and I could feel something tight in my chest.

"My home." She began sadly, "It's wonderful. The people, my friends are wonderful. The ocean sparkles in the sunset and there is a warmth to it even on the coldest of days. To be honest I've changed locations so many times lately, I don't feel much for any land. Just for the people I leave behind." Suddenly she got her smile back beaming at me she laughed uncomfortably, "I've been gone so long I wonder If I will ever find my way back."

"I'm sure you will duchess." I replied feeling the pain in my chest subside a little.

"Call me Liss! Duchess is so, stuffy." she asked. How could I deny anything from her?

"Of course Liss." Saying it made me feel a bit free, I sighed in content. Liss turned about and crouched low to the ground touching the dirt there and smelling her fingers. Sometimes her behavior worried me.

"I smell a Jack!" she exclaimed. Her infatuation with this pirate worried me, a lady such as herself shouldn't be mixed up with a man like that. She brushed her hands off on her thighs, I began to imagine her thighs…get a hold of yourself Will!

"When you threatened me with Jack's.."

"Captain!"

"Right, Captain Jack's cutlass, you seemed to know what you were doing. How is that?" I asked hoping to regain control of my mind.

"I took fencing lessons, when I was young, and karate." She said simply. At times she was a bit vague which added to her appeal. We were now approaching the harbor, if I didn't say something soon she would go off to find that pirate.

"Would you do me the honor of.." I began but she cut me off.

"I'm soooo not ready to get married!" She said putting a hand up. I could feel my face get flushed.

"No, of course not, I mean! What I was trying to say, was, would you accompany me for the day. Do me the honor of spending the day with me?" That was rather hard to say.

"Sure." she answered. So simple for her to say, to give her time out, but it meant more to me than I thought it would.

…………NORRINGTON'S POV…………

Across town in Commodore Norrington's office.

"Duchess indeed, whatever web of tangled lies she has spun in the Governor's mind is soon to unravel. She is in with that pirate, I intend to see them both hang in the gallows."

Bum-Bum-Bum-buuuumm! Sorry the chapter is short, I'm getting such horrible writers block, I know what I want to happen in the story, but it's just slow goings to get to it. I'm trying to keep it in first person as much as possible so you guys don't get too confused. But doing so may be twice as confusing. Just remember who's turn it is to be first person. It's like tag, in the dark. Anyway, thanks so much for reading, even if you don't review you're important to me because of the hits you bring to my stories. But if you do have the time it would be nice if you just give me a little shout out. And thanks to those who put me on your favorites list because then you pull in more readers for me! So that means just as much to me as reviews! Until the next chapter!


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: DOPOTC! Haha, that is my new 'don't own pirates of the Caribbean' logo. Sound it out, it kind of sounds like Mixe (Me - hay)! An indigenous language from Mexico that some of the decedents of the Aztecs use. Like my boyfriend! On with it!

Chapter Nine: Will and Liss' day out! Part II

………..LISS' POV…………

Hanging out with the quiet yet studly Orlando wouldn't be so bad! I mean what could be the harm? We started out going through the towns market. Getting lots of looks from the people, one because Williams hot, two because I'm hot, and three because I was dressed in pants.

"You don't mind hanging out with a girl in pants?" I joked walking alongside him towards his shop again.

"Well, it's not how I pictured myself when I was a lad, but your company is quite enjoyable." He replied. Oh so smooth!

"So what is going on between you and Elizabeth? I thought you guys were all gaga for each other." I said finally saying what I wanted to say since the incident that morning. Why do I always make this kid blush?

"I'm afraid I don't know what you are talking about." He replied, oh William, I'm a woman I know very well what you are doing.

"Liar! Now tell me now or I will be forced to make a scene!" I threatened. This seemed to work because he stopped walking and faced me, a look on his face that suggested he wasn't going to enjoy telling me.

"Yesterday when we were pursuing you in your attempts to catch Sparrow… Captain Sparrow… She said you were a Pirate's… how do I say this… strumpet." he was bracing himself for the worst, which was me laughing.

"I wish! I mean, erm, eh-hem! You don't say?!" my eyes were watering to keep from laughing. Little did he know I wished to be Jack's strumpet.

"This doesn't bother you?" William asked.

"She is a girl, she feels threatened! I'm royalty, she is infatuated with you! But she also knows that it would be easy for any girl to become infatuated with you." I said laughing placing a hand on his chest. Little did I know who was watching me as I did such a small gesture.

"What scene would you have made if I hadn't told you?" intrigued that I would do something in public.

"Probably babble like a monkey and scratch myself, so where is your shop anyway?"

Once inside I was amazed at al the tools he used to do his job. The first time I had been there I had just been in passing, but now I was looking around at everything. I noticed flat sheets of metal, curved sheets of metal, and lots and lots of cutlass'. Then that amazing light bulb in my head went off like I had predicted. I would have Will make the part to fix my gas tank! It was brilliant! Now to persuade him!

"Oh William I'm so amazed at everything in here." I said grasping a cutlass and testing its weight. No, too heavy. I put that one back and reached for another one.

"You truly think this profession is interesting?" Awww! He looks so cute when he questions me like that!

"Yes as a matter of fact, I have a little job that maybe you could do for me?" Finally finding the perfect cutlass I got closer to him putting on my fox face. "This is such a fine cutlass…" I cooed putting the point in the dirt in front of him and leaning ever closer to his tan face. Man he is a very attractive man, I could easily find myself jumping him if I wasn't careful.

…………JACK'S POV…………

"Aye, the lass is a strumpet alright! But not mine!" I turned away, I couldn't watch anymore of this. Really I couldn't, they moved out of me view!

To think I was about to go soft on the lass for saving 'ol Jack's life a few times. Pah! Not anymore!

I was in the middle of trying to figure out the best way to commandeer the Interceptor when I saw the eunuch whelp and the lass from the future playing grab ass in town. Thinks she can play us both eh? Not this pirate!

"Oh, Jack! I've been looking for you!" I might as well go to Davy Jones' Locker now.

"Have ye? Miss me that much?" Let's see what she has to say to that!

"Actually yea! Want to walk me back to the house?" Does she think she can fool me into being a proper gent?

"I see no profit in it for me!" Ha! Whats you say to that! Try and get a proper answer, ye can't win 'em all lass.

"My company? Savvy?" Hey, what is that face she is doing? Is she trying to manipulate me with things of the feminine manner?

Walking with the lass didn't seem so bad, she kept me occupied. She did save me life right? She wasn't all bad, rather interesting. Plus I wanted to know about me future. But the lass wasn't budging. Time to turn on the Captain Sparrow charm.

"But why not?" I wouldn't say I was whining, more like, asking impatiently.

"Because, you could avoid one little thing and ruin it for millions of fans and they would all come after me with pitch forks and torches trying to behead me! It's no fun if you don't get slapped around a bit…erm a lot!" she made a motion to smack me but I ducked out of her hand range.

"I wasn't going to slap you Jack, your future holds so many red marks! And you will die one day." Was she trying to toy with me, get me off guard to steal me soul?

"Everyone dies luv, part of life."

"Yea, but you die twice!" Aw, that was it! The lass was going to tell me everything or I was going to… well, I'm not sure right now, but it wont be something pleasant.

When we arrived to the house, the lass and I were greeted by the other lass, whatsername, Elizabeth, ah yes! She must be in love with 'ol Jack, because she can't seem to leave me alone!

"Great news!" Other lass said.

"Awesome what is that?" Lass replied.

"Father is going to throw a party in your honor!" Other lass exclaimed.

"Wow! When and where?" Lass asked.

"Aboard the Interceptor tomorrow night!" Other lass answered.

Both the Lasses seemed pretty excited about this, I was excited because I was sure to find rum.

"A party? I love parties! Drinks all around!" Only the lass laughed. Maybe other lass was a bit too stuffy.

Fin! Well for now, since I'm online I want to get this chapter posted so you have something new to read, and if not you would only get one short chapter instead of two. Hopefully you like where this is going, if not, I'm a loser. Sorry! Oh and her name isn't Shannon, that was my bad! Totally got mixed up there! You know how it is! Until Chapter 10! Ciao!


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: DOPOTC ! This is the chapter leading up to the party, who knows I might get into the party! I don't know because I have yet to write it. So I will start writing it so we can all find out! Oh, I love surprises!! This chapter starts out with Liss' point of view.

P.S.

This is also now my longest story! Not chapter wise, word wise! Party at my house BYOB, finger food will be served, by mole people.

Chapter Ten: Captain or Smithy?

After Elizabeth told us of the party tomorrow on the Interceptor I ditched Jack to spend some time alone. I had successfully persuaded Will to make the part for my tank. I had to flirt a little, but when don't I have to flirt?

Thinking alone in the chair in my room was a good way to wonder why Elizabeth would call me a strumpet then act excited about the fact there was going to be a party in my honor.

A knock on my door startled me out of my deep thoughts. I rose from the soft cushions of the chair and wearily walked over to the door. Turning the handle and opening it with caution I peaked out to see a maid carrying a robe.

"Miss if you like the bath is ready for you." She chirped meekly. Ah, a bath, second most wonderful thing in this world! I will let you figure out the first on your own!

"Very well." I said marching out of the room following her.

It seems the minute I was seated in the bath my shoulders relaxed and all my worries were being ironed out of my mind. I let the water sedate me as I breathed deeply. Happy to still be alone and even happier to be relaxing in a tub.

WHAM! The lovely sound the door makes when it is thrown open.

Shit! Why?! Why now!

"Lass I be havin' some things that be on me mind!" Damnit Jack.

"I'm a bit, occupied!" I said motioning to the sudsy water around me. He didn't seem to notice, and that was fine with me, hopefully this wouldn't take so long so all the bubbles would have a chance to pop.

" It's about you and the eunuch whelp." Shit, I did miss the eunuch joke.

"What of it?" I asked, not sure what he meant.

"I saw you two today, in the blacksmith shop." He said walking nearer to the tub. I took in a deep breath hoping he would stop a good distance away but he didn't. Of course he didn't, he is Jack Sparrow. He sat on the edge of the tub glaring me in the eyes.

"What of it?" I asked again a bit more nervous.

"Well I couldn't help feeling a bit like you had affections for 'ol Jack, and there ye go off with the one who got snipped." He said giving me puppy eyes swirling his finger in the bath water, stirring up the bubbles.

"As much as I know how hard it is for you to share your feelings, It is just as hard for me to discuss them when I'm nude in a bath tub with nigh but bubbles for cover." I said crossing my arms protectively as the bubbles began to decrease in number.

"Tell me one thing lass." Jack said leaning in towards me, "What did you do today with the lad?" Was Jack jealous? What the heck was going on?

"Nothing! Why is it any of your business what I do and who I do?" I asked cockily. Jack leaned back, and started unraveling the cloth around his wrists. He removed his hat and his effects throwing them on the ground.

"J-Jack, what are you doing?" I asked a bit nervously.

"You know what I find interesting," He asked removing his red head band, "Ye be the only person I be lettin' call me Jack." I thought about this for a moment, that is true, he does correct everyone else but me.

"Because you know if you are nice to me, I can tell you about your future." I offered. I started to get worried as most of the bubbles had disappeared and Jack removed his shirt.

"I'm not too worried about my future tonight lass." He said leaning in to me. His tan chest in the candlelight. He got ever closer to me placing his hands on either side of me.

"What is it you are worried about?" I asked leaning towards him. I knew Jack's reputation as a ladies man, and I could live with that, at least for tonight.

"If ye be wantin' me or the whelp." He said in a seductive voice. Little did he know he was playing with the mans lady.

"I be wantin' ye." I said in just a seductive pirate voice. He quirked an eyebrow at me. I leaned mere millimeters from his lips staring him in the face. He closed his eyes and the gap.

…………NORRINGTONS POV…………

"Is it done?" I asked facing the window watching the storm clouds roll by.

"Yes, hopefully the weather holds." Elizabeth replied glancing at the storm clouds that were the object of my transfixion. She was beautiful even in this grey lighting.

"Can you tell me why you are so adamant that these two are captured?" I asked her quizzically.

"Whether I believe it right or wrong that you condemn these two people to death is not what you are really interested in is it? You want to know if I'm doing this for the sake of you, or myself. Well, Commodore, Myself." She replied coldly.

"And you believe me that the Duchess is not who she says she is." I offered.

"I don't care if she is a Duchess or not, I just want her out of Port Royal." I smirked at the cruelty in her voice. What could have sparked such fury into someone as soft and sweet as her?

"Well then, if Jack tries to commandeer the Interceptor, and if she helps, as I predict," I stopped turning my attention fully to Elizabeth, "we will have them both in the noose." I smiled to myself imagining my victory as Elizabeth scoffed and walked out of my office.

…………The Next Day…………

…………LISS' POV…………

I awoke with a start as the curtains were thrown open and the maids bustled around the room. Groggily I lifted my head and peered about.

"Miss 'tis already 5 o' clock the party starts in an hour, if you wish to make it on time I'm afraid we will have to get started now." She said.

"Get started? On what?" I asked. I felt something prodding me in my side. Confused I peaked under the covers to see a distressed and oxygen deprived Jack. Crap.

"On getting you dressed Miss." Frick! Thank god for fluffy comforters. I looked around and counted the maids, three, FRICK ON A STICK!

"Oh, that wont be necessary I am sure I can manage it on my own." I replied.

"Now miss, you've been having trying times lately, and all of us can see how tired you still look, you could use some help." the taller one said with a soft smile. FRICK! Why do they have to be so sincere and nice?

"Um, well, it's that…" another poke and I took a chance to side glance at Jack. He was drawing a finger across his throat. Damnit. "That won't be necessary because I am very capable of it on my own. Greenland grows them strong you know! Now all of you! Shoo!" I huffed seeming agitated when really I felt guilty for acting so harsh.

The three exited looking hurt and abused, like little squirrels that had lost their nuts. I'm assuming that is what squirrels look like when they lose their nuts, who's to say?

"Good show luv, now how about a romp?" Jack asked caressing my cheek. Ok, time to rewind and figure out why the hell Jack is in my bed.

…………Recap of the night before…………

Jack kissed me, tried to get in the tub, I pushed him out, ordering him out of the bath house. He grudgingly left, we met up again outside my room. We kissed again, I let him in, we had a major make out session and… Did I? No, I wouldn't… millions of fan girls would have my head if I had… FRICK ON A STICK!

…………Back To the present, well, the past, well… you know what I mean…………

"Did we?" I questioned, pointing a finger at each one of us in turn.

"No, much to my dismay, ye only let me feel around a bit. But I was hoping to change that this morn." Jack cooed in my ear. Oh the temptation was there, the devil was tempting me with the sins of Jack's flesh that I was all too willing to accept.

"You have to go, I have to get ready for this party." I stated simply letting him continue his kisses down my neck.

"Aye, but ye be looking so fine in your..."

"Jack don't even finish that sentence, forget what you see here, and leave!" I said pushing him off with one hand and clutching the bedding protectively.

Looking like a, well a squirrel that lost his nuts, probably to blue balls in this case, Jack crept out of bed and retreated out the door with his tail between his legs. That was amazingly easy and I was well unawares for it.

"I'm the stupidest girl in the world. Although, I'm not sure they invented penicillin yet so it is not a good idea to bump uglies with this particular pirate." I whispered to myself.

Ok, so I'm very sorry that I didn't get to the party, but you know how these things are! Disclaimers are written before the story most of the time. Sure I could just go to the top and erase the false hope I had just given you, but what is the fun in that? Also I'm too lazy, and to scroll that far up … it is just not an option. Hope you like it so far, I'm sure none of you care I turned Elizabeth evil after she was so much fun, because of the kiss and games she plays with well, James, Jack, and Will's hearts. But she is a pirate, kudos to her and what not. Blech.

P.S.

I don't ask this often, but since this is a special occasion and all, please review if you read this! Just one little review of two or three words!


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: DOPOTC! This is it, the party! Are you excited?? Yea, me either, I was just pretending so if you were, you didn't feel stupid. I'm all about the readers! Ok on with the story.

Chapter Eleven: Unexpected Questions and Party Fever!

Fin! And damn I looked good if I do say so myself. Looking at myself in the mirror made me all excited! I couldn't wait to go, but then there was that nagging voice in the back of my head that was screaming at me to run away, run very far away. But I looked too good to do that.

I let my long blonde hair fall around my back and down my shoulders. Only a few curls were tied back keeping my face clear of any hairs. A small gold tiara I had laying around from Prom was delicately resting on my head.

I had put bits of gold foil around the outsides of my eyes. My tan skin was dusted with shimmer. My lips a translucent gold. My eyelashes thick and lush, with heavy eyeliner framing my green eyes. My bare neck, chest and shoulders were dusted with the same shimmer as my cheeks.

My dress was, of course, gold, the silk fabric clutched my bodies form. Staying tight until my hips it then flowed down. My shoes were gold, with gems tracing up my feet. I was, well mostly gold, but it worked.

Hearing a knock at the door I quickly grabbed my clutch, and went to the door knowing that it was the maid telling me the carriage was waiting. I swung open the door to see the maid I was expecting, she complimented my dress and told me the carriage was waiting as I had thought.

Although I knew I looked so damn good I was still uneasy because I was a little underdressed for this time era. Luckily, I looked like royalty. While Elizabeth was dressed in about 200 yards of fabric, and the Governor was covered in feathers, well his hat anyway. No one knew where Jack went and I was starting to get worried as the voice kept nagging and nagging at me.

Rolling up to the Interceptor made my stomach turn. Even the butterflies inside my stomach were throwing up. I had the sudden urge to be in Jack's arms, protected and safe. The snap of the carriage door ripped me out of my fantasy. And there was the driver to help Elizabeth and I out of the carriage. Once out of the carriage Governor Swann offered his arm to his daughter to escort her to the ship. And that left me alone.

Smiling to passing upper class citizens, and trudging my way up the docks to the ship with a bad feeling looming over me. Suddenly my arm was grasped and I was pulled closely to someone's side.

"Jack!?" I asked hopefully, looking over I saw Norrington. Frick.

"You seem hopeful, sorry to disappoint you." He said sneering at me, "Don't think everyone is fooled by you, or that pirate Jack Sparrow."  
"Captain." I corrected as his grip on my arm became painful. My face winced in pain.

"Forgive me duchess. Whatever you two are planning today will be your downfall." He remarked ever tightening his grip on my upper arm, "By the way, _duchess,_ you look lovely tonight, pity you will soon be behind bars."

"Excuse me Commodore, but I was under the impression I was the duchess's escort tonight." Came a smooth voice from behind us.

The Commodore and I turned to see a very dashing William dressed in royal blues and gold trimmings. Norrington's grip loosened on my arm and he glared at William.

"I was unaware that the duchess was allowing herself to be escorted by a humble blacksmith." Norrington said.

"And I was unaware that you were allowed to choose who the duchess is associated with and not." William rebutted.

"And I was unawares that either of ye be associated with me bonny lass." Came Jack's voice from behind William. My face lit up immediately which William and Norrington both noticed. "And if I were ye, I would remove your hand from her." Jack warned. Norrington grudgingly released my arm which I rubbed sorely.

William stepped aside as Jack walked passed and came up to my side, I quickly dodged behind him to avoid Norrington.

"Sorry I'm late luv, I was getting me hair done." Jack smirked.

"Your bonny lass?" William asked looking at me behind Jack.

"Aye, what of it?" Jack quipped.

"Sorry to interrupt this magical moment, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to see you three later." Norrington said glaring me down and turning towards the Interceptor walking hastily to the Governor.

"Liss?" William gave me a questioning hurt look as I slipped out from behind Jack.

"William, I.." I began but Jack interrupted.

"She's with me, funny little world innit?" Jack commented. I gave Will a sorry type of look. It was hard for him to hide that he was hurt. I guess in the long run it would be better that he fell back in love with Elizabeth once I'm gone anyway.

"Thanks for helping me with Norrington, William." I said giving him a weak smile.

"It was my pleasure, duchess." William said giving me a shallow bow and walking past Jack and I.

I bit my lip as William slipped past us. Not knowing what to say and being oddly heartbroken over the whole thing Jack placed an arm around my shoulders.

"Luv, I know it's hard, but ye have me." Jack said reassuringly, "By the way, you look amazing." I blushed at his comment and allowed him to lead me up to the Interceptor.

It was amazingly amusing to see peoples distaste for having a pirate among them. The lanterns were giving a soft glow about the deck and I had wandered to the upper deck with my Champaign glass. I was leaning over the railing just listening to the waves crash against the haul. It was only the sixth time I had been on a boat this size and it did something to soothe me.

The breezed blew across my bare back swishing my hair to my right. I felt kisses along my neck and shoulder. I smiled knowing it was Jack, what a perfect touch to this night despite Norrington's threats.

"Oh, Jack, this night is wonderful." I said tilting my head so his kisses could trail further up my neck.

"That's the second time today you have confused me for your beloved pirate." I heard. Gasping I twirled around at which Norrington grasped my wrist and covered my mouth with his other hand he made me jolt dropping my glass over board to be lost to the choppy waves below.

Pressing me up against the railing Norrington put his body weight against me forcing my back into the railing.

"I can offer you an escape from your fate. If you want." At this he brushed his lips against the side of my cheek. "Duchess or not, you are a fine woman that any man would love to put on his mantle."

At this I narrowed my eyes trying to free my hand from between the railing and my own body but the pressure from the Commodore was crushing. I pursed my lips as he released his hand covering my mouth and began trailing a finger down my neck and around my collar bone dipping in towards my cleavage.

"Just remember at any moment if you give yourself to me, you will be protected from the gallows." Norrington whispered in my ear. I let out a little squeak before his hand delved any lower.

A shadowy form appeared behind the Commodore tapping him on the shoulder. Instantly he released me and I sighed in relief. Scrambling out of his reach towards the shadow. It was William, and he looked pissed.

"What makes you think it is alright to treat a lady such as you have?" Will questioned.

"And what would you know of how to treat a lady?" Norrington sternly stated, not expecting an answer.

"You had no right to treat her in such a way!" William said a tad loudly. Jack's bonny lass senses began to tingle and he immediately started barreling towards us at well, a drunken pace.

Getting tired of other people trying to defend my honor, I pulled back my fist and gave one to the Commodore right in the kisser.

Finally Jack arrived looking from me rubbing my fist, from Norrington rubbing his chin, and from William looking awe struck.

"Now that's my bonny lass!" Jack exclaimed throwing his arms open and expecting me to run into them for comfort. I did rush past William, and I pushed Jack out of the way as I ran towards the gang plank and past a crowd of confused party guests.

There she be! And this is the night before I go see Pirates of the Caribbean 3! Here in San Diego they have the Thursday 8pm showing, I don't know about other parts of the country…probably. But my boyfriend bought me tickets to go see it! Yay me! So hopefully my POTC muse will whack me in the head with a talent stick! Hopefully you like it, and please review! I like to know my work is appreciated!


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: DOPOTC! So now what will Liss do? Be with the fun but irresponsible Jack? Be with the sweet and sensitive William? Or with Norrington to assure her safety in her final days in Port Royal? Who's to say? I'm excited too because even I don't know who she will choose!

Chapter Twelve: Hard decisions and empty promises.

Life is difficult. Don't fall into that bullcrap they teach you in school. Even the teachers get depressed when they are forced to push that shit, want to know why? It dredges up all the old hopes and dreams they had held for themselves, all the unfulfilled aspirations. What sent me spiraling into such a foul and dark mood? Hard decisions.

I had run from my problems, like a coward, I scurried away to leave other people to clean up the mess in my wake. And I punched a bloody Commodore, you can't tell me that wouldn't have repercussions in the morning like a horrible hangover.

I had no place of my own to go, and I had spent the last twenty minutes wandering the street cold and alone searching for something, but what? Fighting back the tears of utter despair and hopelessness I trudged along. The slow and somber walk of someone who has nothing left but the will to push ahead.

It had just occurred to me that I had pushed away the only things in this place that could ever make me feel better. Will and Jack. But I had deceived William, and Jack, well really I can't think of anything horrible I did to Jack but I still felt like blaming myself.

I had the most horrible suspicion that someone was following me. I had passed a pub a few minutes ago and got lots of cat calls from the men inside. Could it be possible I was in for more sexual harassment tonight? If so I was going to be ready.

So on my little jog away from who ever was following me I started thinking about all the sad and miserable things that had happen to me since I had arrived in Port Royal. A pebble up my nose, a concussion, a little thing I like to call corset torture, I'd been shot, threatened, used, abused and yet between all these horrible memories were ones I wouldn't trade for anything. Jack and I bantering back and forth, the look on Will's face when I wore pants, the kiss I had shared with Jack in the bath house, and punching Norrington.

I was living every fan girls dream. But yet I hadn't felt this alone since I had first moved out by myself to San Diego. Slowly I came upon the Swann residence, but I felt like I couldn't return there, not until it was much darker and much later. Then I remembered my car the only thing that I had here that would give me a little amount of comfort. Shaking off the cold air on my damp body I crept my way to my car.

Maneuvering through the logs was difficult and in the pale moonlight well, it was almost impossible. I had to remove my shoes and hike up my dress to avoid getting it snagged. To be honest I was very terrified from all the horror movies I had ever seen in my life, to be alone in the dark in the woods…well I have goose bumps as you read this.

Roughly ten minutes later I arrived at my car. Seeing it made me relax a little, like being reunited with an old friend. Digging about in my clutch I pulled out my keys and proceeded to the drivers side door, but a movement towards the hood stopped me and got my heart started. With so much adrenaline pumping through my system I was surprised my heart didn't explode.

"Is that you luv?" Oh my god, it's just Jack, I'm going to kick his ass for scaring me like that.

"Jack!" I exclaimed running into his arms, catching him off guard. Happily he took me and caressed my head as I rested it on his shoulder.

"I was worried about you." He confided. What? Jack Sparrow worried about a girl? I'm not a ship, so why would he care enough about me to worry?

"Why is that?" I asked expecting and answer like, 'Because ye have the rum' or 'I hadn't gotten to sleep with ye yet!'.

"Because ye looked rather upset, and I wanted to be there for you." I stopped breathing. Pulling away I squinted at his face to make sure it was him. I guess sometimes you get lucky with Jack. He is nice to you for a few minutes about as often as Davy Jones can step on land, this was just a fleeting emotion for him.

"Wha-" I began confused, obviously.

"When we first met, aboard the Interceptor, and you asked me if I needed help to commandeer the ship, I thought to meself 'now here is a lass I can warm up to'. And further on, you saved me life, not once but twice." He stopped holding me at arms length, "What I'm saying is that Captain Jack Sparrow never leaves a debt unsettled." I thought about this and nodded my head a little in agreement.

"Three times if you count the time I defended you from William…" I said modestly.

"Now tell me what happened tonight lass that left you three in such a state of disarray." Jack asked letting my arms go. I leaned against the side of the door and began the story starting with the waves against the haul.

"That mangy bugger!" Jack exclaimed hearing the whole story. It felt nice that Jack honestly cared about my well being. Something I thought he cared little about seeing as he tends to let people down here and there.

"It's nothing, at least I know his weakness. If anything happens I can just sleep with him to get what I want!" I said trying to lighten the mood.

"I don't know how you do things in the future, but here that only works in Tortuga." Jack explained.

Trying to smile, the events of the night piled up in my emotions box until it was over filled. Before I even knew I was about to cry Jack had me in his arms. Letting the tears come freely but without making a sound was my way of emptying the nights disaster. Jack kissed the top of my head affectionately.

A rustle came from the trees behind us as the sound of someone tripping echoed into the forest. Jack kept a protective arm around me while he pulled out his gun and cocked it pointing it in the direction of the noise.

"It's me, It's William." Will called out emerging from the trees. I motioned for Jack to put down the gun, but he only did so after I put a hand on top and forcefully pushed it down. Shrugging Jack pocketed the gun again.

"How long 'ave ye been there lad?" Jack asked suspiciously.

"Long enough. Duchess please tell me what is going on." Will pleaded. Ugh, not another long story.

"Why ye be wanting to know so badly?" Jack asked. I shivered from the cold night air. Both men noticed and that was all she wrote, they were in a race to see who could remove their jacket the fastest to offer it to me. Blushing I insisted I was fine.

"But Liss you will catch your death of cold out here." William said insisting I take HIS jacket.

"William, I come from a place called the north mid-west, we have snow 7 out of 12 months, and I wander about outside barefoot at times!" I exclaimed.

"Ye be my bonny lass, and ye'll be taken me jacket." Jack said straight up.

"As much as I appreciate the offers, I can take care of myself." I said opening the car door and popping my trunk.

I had my emergency stuck in a snow storm in southern California kit a.k.a beach party kit, packed in my trunk. Four blankets, food rations consisting of mostly candy, and s'more ingredients, a lighter, and some reading material.

"Bloody magic monstrosity." I heard Jack mumble to himself as he pulled on his jacket once more. I pulled out a hoodie I had laying in the back seat and put it on.

"You want to know what is going on?" I asked to William, who nodded with a kind of resoluteness, "Fine then, go get some kindling and fire wood and I will tell you everything." Laying the blankets down by the car I sat myself down and waited for Will's return.

Sitting around the fire after I had explained my entire story to William was a little freeing. There were no longer any lies between me and him, and I felt closer to him in a way. Not as close as Jack had insisted we sit, but close enough. Jack had actually fallen asleep, his head in my lap.

"So you aren't a duchess." William asked sitting with his knees drawn up to his chest.

"Nope, I'm just a med student, trying to work my way up to be an ER doctor." I sighed thinking of all the school I had missed.

"And you and Jack?" William questioned hopefully.

I sighed looking down at Jack sleeping. Must have had a bit too much rum tonight. I caressed his cheek affectionately avoiding the open wound on his right jaw line, you know the one that never seems to heal. Mumbling a bit he opened one eye to see me, grabbing my hand he kissed it and got comfy before falling back asleep.

"I know things wont work out between me and anyone here. I'm too different, and I have to go back home." I said feeling a choking sensation in my throat.

Will laughed, "You and Jack are exactly the same person."

"I suppose so." I said staring into the fire.

What seemed like an hour later both William and Jack were asleep but I was still looking around at the fire and the shadows that danced across the forest. Jack moved about in my lap and noticed that I was still awake.

"You alright?" He asked squinting up at me. I nodded at him giving him a weak smile. "Ye want to go back to the house an' get in bed?" He asked sitting up. I shook my head.

"Jack, what are you going to do once I go back home?" I asked, he looked a little taken aback. He pushed a finger to his pursed lips and looked thoughtful for a moment.

"I wasn't expectin' you to go back." Jack said finally. I looked a little surprised and furrowed my brow at him. "Didn't ye wonder why I was so late to the party?"

"I figured you were getting some pre rum in." I replied.

"True enough, but, I was also looking for this." He said pulling something shiny out of his pocket. I gasped as he held up a gold ring with a giant princess cut diamond fitted on top.

"Oh, Jack." I said looking at it in awe.

"I wanted to give it to you on the ship, but ye ran off before I had a chance to." Jack said twisting the ring in the fire light. "And there be something I've been wantin' to ask you."

There you have chapter twelve. OMG is he going to propose? Didn't William try that one once? What the heck did they put in his rum? I wonder what the big question is! And if you are completely offended by the fact I would whack Jack's character and personality, trust me before you flame me please! Like OMG 7 hours until POTC3!! Well on to Chapter 13 for me, see you there!


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: DOPOTC! So this is it, what the heck could Jack possibly want to ask Liss? And as the story draws to the close I will start tying up some loose ends, maybe get another story started, so keep an eye out! 5 hours until POTC3!!

Chapter Thirteen: The most important question.

Jack held the ring in front of me as the light from the fire made it sparkle and shine. Jack smiled at my expression and put an arm around me.

"I've wanted to ask ye if you would stay with me here, in this time." Jack began. My mind was racing, stay here and marry Jack or go back home and live my life in 2007.

"Jack, I…" But Jack held up a finger.

"Now lass let me finish." he said peering into the diamond of the ring, "I was wondering if you would consider becoming my first mate, erm, lass." Jack finished.

Eyes bulging and mouth agape I stared at Jack who took this as a good sign. Closing my mouth I narrowed my eyes and smirked.

"I think Mr. Gibbs would be a bit offended that you chose an unlucky girl as your first mate. And don't you technically need a boat for a first mate?" I retorted.

"How do you know about Mr. Gibbs?" Jack questioned ignoring my second question. I gave him a side glance, "Oh right, future, forgot."

"Anyway Jack, William told me that he got the part for my car ready, so soon I will be heading home anyway." I reminded him.

"Aye." He said sulkily. Lifting me up he held me in his lap with his chin resting on top of my head, I could hear the faint hum of 'Yo Ho Yo Ho a Pirates Life for me.'

The smoke from the fire smoldering woke me up in the wee hours of the morning. I was laying on my side my head close to Williams. I sat up searching for Jack. Poking William to wake him I noticed the ring on my finger. Jack must have put it there before leaving the night before. William arose a bit groggily and looked over at me looking at the ring.

Catching William staring at me was a bit uncomfortable, but he seemed more uncomfortable.

"Where's Jack?" He asked getting up. Shit.

"I hope he is still here in Port Royal or else I have messed things up." I said playing with the ring with my thumb.

Standing up I gathered the blankets and threw them back into my trunk. Lifting up my hair I turned to Will.

"Do you think you can unzip me?" I asked showing him my back. The dress had to go for sure.

Walking up to the house with William in tow, me in different clothes and him in the same ones as the night before was definitely a sight for the people of the manor to behold. Elizabeth seemed exceptionally pissed to see us, but something about her posture got my attention immediately.

"What are you two doing together?" She asked glaring at me.

"Really long story," I said ignoring her expression, "Do you know where Jack is?" I asked.

"You may want to go see Commodore Norrington about your beloved Pirate." Elizabeth retorted.

"What did you do?" William breathed.

"Not what I did, but what he did." She smirked. Man I was really starting not to like her. I guess me showing up with Will made her have the same feelings for me. My bad.

"Where is Norrington?" I asked hurriedly my stomach beginning to twinge.

"At the fort." She said, It was all too easy to get answers out of her.

Running to the fort alone was not much fun. I had insisted that William stay behind and he not get mixed up in this, he grudgingly obliged. Scaling the stairs two at a time to the top near the bell knocking down soldiers I wrestled my way to the top. Reaching the top platforms I panted for air and looked around at the soldiers and cannons that surrounded me.

"NORRINGTON!" I hollered. Sure I looked like a crazy lady, but in all actuality I was. Coming out of a small door to my left Norrington approached me, smiling.

"I knew you would show up eventually, I'd kind of hoped it was later than sooner." He chuckled.

"Where is Jack?" I seethed through clenched teeth.

"Ah, yes your Captain. He is set to hang in the gallows in an hours time for attempting to commandeer the Interceptor." Norrington explained happily.

"No." I gasped.

"Indeed, unless of course, you would like to go discuss the situation in private in my office." He smirked.

"I want to see Jack first." The smile from the Commodores face fell and he nodded agreeing. Motioning to his left he escorted me to the Jail.

Seeing Jack behind bars was a more depressing sight than seeing him on the T.V screen. Kneeling down in the dirt and grime I placed my hands on the bars. Jack moved the hat from his eyes and looked in surprised at me.

"Liss!?" Jack exclaimed. This threw me off, the tears began to flow, he had never called me by my name before.

"Jack! What did you do?" I exclaimed as he took my hand through the bars.

"Nothing worth mentioning." He smirked. I rolled my eyes at him.

"Don't worry Jack, I will get you out of here." I said leaning my head against the bars. Norrington behind me scoffed.

"An unlikely event." Norrington laughed. I glared back at him.

"How do ye plan on doing that?" Jack asked almost as skeptical as Norrington. I peered over at Jack's effects and saw his cutlass.

"I challenge the Commodore to a duel." I said dead serious.

There she be, again, a short chapter. But you know something, I'm happy with that. Only two hours until POTC3!! I don't type slow, I just take frequent breaks in my writing! Well Chapter fourteen after POTC3!


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: DOPOTC! I SAW POTC3!! OMG I'M GOING AGAIN AND AGAIN, EVERY DAY UNTIL IT IS OUT OF THE THEATER! Huff, take a deep breath, relax and write! I wont ruin the movie for those of you that haven't seen it, but in a few days that promise may run out!

Chapter Fourteen: The time to set things right.

Pulling on Jack's effects was fun despite the situation. Norrington had put Jack in irons so he could watch 'The utter defeat of his bonny lass' as Norrington said. You may be wondering how I got Norrington to agree to a duel. Well, I'll tell you, If I win, Jack goes free, If he wins, Jack goes to the gallows and well let us just say I'll be Norrington's new bonny lass.

Swiping Jack's hat I placed it on my head to complete my ensemble. Noticing the look he was giving me I shrugged.

"I'm sorry I know, I know, your hat is sacred…" I said reaching to take it off.

"No lass keep it on. It looks good on you." He smiled weakly. I could tell what he was thinking, that this was one of the last times he was going to see me until he went to the gallows. Well, I couldn't tell you I was one hundred percent sure he wasn't going. But I had a back up plan if things didn't go my way.

"The public will come for a hanging but see a sword fight, how interesting." Norrington sneered.

Checking Jack's belt I found his compass, making sure as no one would see I stowed it away in one of the pockets of my cargo pants I was wearing. After safely buckling and latching the pocket closed I pulled out Jack's cutlass a bit to see the metal gleam in the morning light. Shoving it back I turned to Jack who was flanked by two red coats.

"You know, in the American Revolution you guys are going down!" I remarked to the two of them. Both looked at me like I was crazy and laughed to themselves. Jack smirked also knowing that what I said was true, at least I could give him a little solace.

Norrington was standing near by monitoring our movements closely, which I had hoped on.

Walking closely to Jack I placed my hands on his shoulders looking into his eyes. Both guards got tense as I leaned in and kissed Jack feverishly. His shackled hands started feeling up my stomach and erm, even higher. I threw my arms around his neck embracing him enjoying this. I could feel the Commodores eyes burning in my back which is exactly what I wanted.

Pulling back Jack still had his kissy face on. I laughed at him and he shook his head to regain himself. I caressed his cheek affectionately.

"Jack, I love you." I said staring into his eyes which took on a completely surprised look.

"Well, I figured that one out when you got shot in me place." Jack said nonchalantly. I poked him in the chest and smiled. "Lass, there be something I want you to be havin'," He said looking up towards his beads upon his head, knowing what he meant I shook my head.

"Don't ever give those away Jack Sparrow, It may just save your life one day, after you die. The first time that is." I said a little confused myself. Jack nodded as if he understood.

"Enough of this!" Norrington said, "I've been far too lenient as it is, the hour is approaching." I rolled my eyes which Jack in turn rolled his eyes, I even think one of the guards rolled his eyes, it was hard to tell because I was too busy rolling my eyes.

Stepping a few feet away from Jack I spread my arms and winked at him. "How do I look?" I questioned.

"Like a Pirate." Jack smiled showing me his golden teeth.

Sufficient to say there were a lot of people hanging around for the, well, hanging. Following Norrington out was a bit fun, because everyone parted and allowed us through. Wish people did that for me at rock concerts. Jack followed me, and about twenty guards surrounded him, they were not taking any chances that was for sure.

The guards formed a circle and then began to usher the crowd to the furthest edges of the fortress to give enough room to the Commodore and I. My heart was pounding, my palms sweaty, and my stomach growled. I was hungry. Norrington raised his arm to get the attention of the murmuring crowd.

"Today the Duchess wishes to try and save the life of this man," He said pointing to Jack, "She offered a friendly gentlemen's duel, which I accepted." There were gasps and chattering about the crowd. I heard a loud 'No' from over to my right. There I saw William. I smiled and waved enthusiastically at him.

"Any words before we begin, duchess." Norrington offered.

"Sure, why not! Although I hate giving speeches. Does anyone have anything to eat? Anyone, really I'm starving here! No one? Ok, I'm ready!" I proclaimed. I went to draw Jack's cutlass, but stopped.

"Well there is one more thing," I said sheathing the cutlass once again, I waltzed over to Jack and planted a wonderful kiss on his wonderful lips in front of all the wonderful people. "For good luck." I said letting Jack smile at the Commodore.

"Enough of this!" the Commodore called out pulling out the exquisite sword William had made him. Shooing Jack away I too pulled out Jack's cutlass.

"Don't think I won't go easy on you because you are a lady." Norrington scoffed.

"Same here, don't think I will go easy on you because you are a lady." I laughed, which got the whole crowd to laugh in turn. Evoking the rage of Norrington was rather easy.

He carelessly charged me, which was easily dodged to his left. I turned about quickly to block a direct attack to my head. Using the pressure of his own strength I dodged out of the way allowing him to slash down at the dirt. Sword tip pointing at him I laughed.

"Who is the lady here?" I yelled motioning to the Commodore which got the crowd going. I'm a natural showman.

Regaining his composure Norrington got a look of understanding about his face. Which unnerved me a little. Smiling he walked towards me. I knew that strength wise I was no match, so I was going to have to use his own strength against him. I parried his attack and rolled to his right. He swung and hit the dirt in front of my feet. The whole crowd booed and Jack must of said something along the lines of 'be careful with my hat' or 'watch out for that cat' I wasn't sure.

We had fought our way over to the actual gallows I threw the cutlass up on the deck which got gasps from everyone around.

"Giving up already?" Norrington asked a bit smug. I smiled at him.

"Nope!" I exclaimed giving a round house kick to his right arm holding the sword. Dropping it I took this opportunity to jump up to the platform. Grabbing my cutlass I held my arms out to the crowd which went wild with my antics. Hearing Norrington climbing the steps to the noose I turned around in time to find him coming after me. What happened in the next minutes was a blur. A lot of clanging.

"Give up now and I will go easy on you later." Norrington laughed.

"How about you go easy on me now, and you can give up later?" I offered. Looking dishearten a tad he charged me. I parried again to the side watching as he fell off the platform. Tisking I leaned upon the cutlass.

"Or, you could give up now." I suggested as I stared at him on his back down below. The crowd began to laugh even harder. Not a big fan of heights, I cut the rope to the noose letting the knot get stuck in the rigging. I scaled down the side of the platform. I guess the stairs would have worked better. Dangling near the bottom Norrington cut the rope sending me to the ground inches below.

Regaining myself I jumped up and ran like, well, Jack to the other side of the fortress, which inclined the Commodore to do the same, and well, Jack followed him. Norrington and I exchanged blows as I began climbing the stairs in reverse Jack cautiously following us. I blocked Norrington's sword so Jack could sneak behind me. Seeing the keys for the irons on Norrington's belt became my new target. I parried and with a quick slice I severed the belt letting the keys fall to the ground.

Hooking them with the cutlass I flipped them into my hands, and handed them to Jack. My face went blank as a slicing sound was heard. The crowd gasped, there was a scream that echoed. The shock was too much for me, I couldn't tell if I was screaming or not. I looked down as blood began to drip down to the ground.

There you have your chapter fourteen. Do you like it? Well hopefully watching the brand new pirates movie gave me some good musing to muse over, while using the muse to muster up something amusing. Glad you got this far my friends, and you know, I've only been asking this lately, but if you wouldn't mind reviewing. Mild flaming please. I'm off to write the next chapter!


	15. Chapter 15

Disclaimer: DOPOTC! So I'm like totally psyched about the whole new pirate movie, I went with my boyfriend and it was freaking awesome. I got the whole theater in a riot because the movie was like 5 minutes late to showing it was great. Nothing like getting about 150 people chanting 'Pirates'… God, I'm so proud of myself! On with it!

Chapter Fifteen: Why is it always me?

I dropped the cutlass letting it clang to the ground. Kneeling down on the top platform we had worked our way to. The blood was slowly pooling, and Jack had rid himself of the irons with the keys I had provided him. He knelt down to me.

"Lass are you alright?" He asked grabbing my shoulders as I sunk down. I saw Norrington's face full of shock and surprise and his sword looking like it was dipped in bright blood.

"Alissa!" I heard William scream as he ran up the stairs pushing Norrington out of the way he knelt down. I smiled as he came up to me. The crowd below was buzzing but all I could focus on was the two of them.

"Jack, you have to get out of here." I said pushing on his shoulders when I did so I felt the pain in my side grow ever stronger.

"And leave ye here? What kind of man do you think I am?" He asked giving me a little laugh.

"A pirate." I said removing his hat and placing it on his head. I let my hand wander to my side. The cut was deep, about eighth of an inch above my last rib. It was long about an inch and a half, and bleeding steadily.

"Listen, I'm two years away from being a doctor, I think I can handle this cut." I said assuring him. It wasn't the cut that was worrying me, the cut would heal on its own if I left it, it was infection, the silent killer.

"And where do you suppose I go?" He asked smirking.

"Where ever you want, I will be able to find you." I told him winking. He gave me an understanding look and grabbed his cutlass and his belt from around my waist.

"Jump there." I said pointing to the left side of the bell. Jack gave me a look, and I just sighed, "Hurry before Norrington decides to stop being a statue."

Jack wandered over to the side of the bell as soldiers and townspeople alike started to gather about and Norrington finally came to.

"You will always remember this as the day that you almost…"

"Jack just go!" I yelled as soldiers came about guns pointed.

My eyes watered as the pain became blinding and my head became light with the loss of blood. The last thing I remember was Jack tripping and falling over the edge to the choppy water and rocks below.

I woke up with lots of fabric around my side, I started peeling it back to see about ten stitches. I wasn't sure why I had fainted. Unless I was dead, that would explain it. Oh yes, I remember, I was hungry at the time of the fight, lots of exercise, no blood sugar and bam, lost about a pint of blood, that's why I passed out. Didn't mean I was happy about it.

I obviously hadn't eaten since then because my stomach let me know it. It had went from hungry to sour with eating itself. I looked around at a very different scene than the governor's place. More primitive for this time era. I heard a faint clanking coming from outside the room and that is when it dawned on me. My stuff was here though, everything that was at the Swann's was fit into this little room.

"Stupid cut, stupid everything, stupid Jack!" I murmured attempting to do a sit up. Well that wasn't happening as I fell back down to the bed. Girls let me tell you this, if you ever find yourself in a position to fight for a man with another man who wants you with sharp pointy metal sticks, just don't do it.

A soft knock came at the door. Realizing that I was in nothing more than my pants that had dried blood down my leg, and a sports bra I began to worry. But then I thought well who ever did this to me saw me like this.

"Come in!" I said lazily. The door creaked open to reveal William. He walked in not noticing me yet. He was holding a pot of something steaming, it didn't smell like food, so I got a little disappointed. Glancing at me he quickly turned around.

"Um, Liss, you aren't dressed." He stammered.

"Well, hell you've seen me like this before right?" I asked. He shook his head no. Steaming Frick on a big huge Stick.

"The doctor and maids must have left you like that." He said. I could see the back of his ears turn red.

"Oh, well secrets out, turn around Will." I said laughing. He did so slowly and kept his eyes astray. "It's good to see you, how long have I been asleep?" I asked kneeling up on my arm and swinging my legs over.  
"Since yesterday morning." He said. Still not looking at me.

"Ok, um, what's that you got in your hand?" I asked, standing up, which got his attention as I stumbled about with a large head rush kicking me in the head.

"Some hot water and vodka to clean your wound." He said setting it down on the table near the bed.

"Wonderful!" I said taking the vodka and taking a long swig. Feeling the burning sensation take over the queasy feeling was wonderful. But I was going to be drunk soon if I didn't eat something.

"Say, what would I have to do to persuade you to bring me something to eat?" I asked dabbing my wound with the hot water and splashing it with the vodka.

"Not much." He said chuckling. He walked out of the room as I began to rifle through my things to find something to wear.

Emerging from the room sporting white Bermuda shorts that went well with my tan skin. Also I had on pink and peach colored tank top that was loose around my stomach and I had put on my favorite necklace. I had clipped the compass to my belt loop and I had to retied one of the yellow ballerina styled shoes.

Mr. Brown was drunk and asleep as usual in his chair and William had set out a pretty nice breakfast for us both. Walking gingerly over to the table minding my wound I sat down. William noticed my presence and what I was wearing.

"Uh, you look nice!" he said blushing.

"Come on and say it, I look like a strumpet!" I laughed as William sat down opposite me.

"Now what?" He asked.

"God, I hope we eat." I said reaching for a biscuit. Laughing he too began to 'chow down'.

Sitting back patting the uninjured side of my stomach. William laughed at my behavior as I hiccupped.

"Has Jack shown up?" I asked a wee bit hopeful.

"No, no one has seen him, but they have been searching since I brought you here." He commented.

"Oh, yea thanks for saving my life." I said it like it was something someone said almost every day.

"No worries. After Jack jumped the Commodore and I took you to the surgeon who stitched you up so to say. We brought you back here so I could keep a close eye on you. The Governor suggested you stay there, but I insisted you stay with me, that you would have wanted that." He said looking me in the eyes.

"Yea, thanks again." I said a bit more sincerely. I started to think about what I really wanted. Was it Jack, Will, to go home?

"How is your wound doing?" He asked getting up. I smiled half heartedly raising my shirt to show him. He walked over and trailed his fingers around the cut.

"It makes me feel horrible that a sword I made did this to you." He commented looking up at me. His face was dangerously close to mine, and something came over me. The vodka? The food? The lack of blood? Whatever it was it was making me lean in closer to him. And he was leaning closer to me! What was going on?

"Will?" I said more to make him stop. He leaned back giving me a questioning look. I took Jack's compass and flipped it open only to reveal it was pointing directly at William.

There is your chapter fifteen! I'm not good at cliffhangers. I guess this isn't a cliffhanger, but maybe I get a few good ones in. I guess If I was a good enough writer every chapter would be a cliff hanger, because no one could wait to see what happens next. I'm a loser! Anyway, Review if you have the ability to type! Thanks!


	16. Chapter 16

Disclaimer: DOPOTC! So close to the end, I can feel it! Can you? I sure can! Since I just write this story as I go along I really don't know when it will end. I have a vague idea, and I'm not sure if once I end it if I will make a sequel. I will write more pirate stories for sure, but a sequel I'm not sure. Unless the mafia decides to pay me a visit and threaten me for one. But I met some mafia guys before, not so scary!

Chapter Sixteen: What I really want.

I shook the compass, it still pointed to William. I turned in my seat, still pointed to William. I closed it and opened it and closed it again. I couldn't believe this, was William who I really wanted? But this couldn't be I knew that William ended up marrying Elizabeth. Maybe I was over analyzing this. I probably want William, but I have to go back home right?

"Stupid Compass." I said shutting it and clamping it to my belt loop again.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"What's wrong? What's bloody wrong?" I said elevating my voice in the process. "I've been hit on the head, shot, chased, abused, emotionally distressed most days, sliced, and confused since I've been here!" I said very loudly. "I don't know if I want you, or Jack, or if I just want to go bloody home!" I said getting into hysterics.

"Liss, calm down!" He said patting my shoulder.

"I am calm!" I said, when actually I was as tense as I could be. William walked over to the fire to lean there and gaze at it dancing. I opened the compass once more to see it pointing where William was, but actually it was pointing towards the door.

"William! I know where Jack is!" I said excitedly jumping up out of my seat. The soreness in my side made me a little less enthusiastic.

"How is that?" William said looking at me a little puzzled. Suddenly there was a soft knock at the door. My spirits rose as William quirked an eyebrow at me. I walked over to the door and lifted the wood panel keeping it closed. Nervously I opened the door.

"Good morning, I've come to collect my prize." It was Norrington and as soon as he stepped aside two red coats had me clasped in their clutches.

Ah, to be back in Norrington's office. What fun it was. I was seated behind his desk with my feet up on top. I was shuffling through some papers he had left scattered about. Lots of warrants and execution decrees. Fun job being Commodore. Two guards who didn't look as stupid as Murtog and Mullroy were guarding the door waiting for Norrington to return.

I stood up and turned to them. Walking over with my fox face I got inches from the shorter one's face.

"Come here often?" I asked winking at him. Nothing. "What is your deal?" I yelled. "I'm basically throwing myself at you! Let's have sex right here!" I said this motioning to the desk, this got his eyebrow to quirk. "Are you gay?" I peered down to his private area, "You're not a eunuch are you?" I said putting on my best Jack Sparrow face.

Just then Norrington came into the office and signaled the two to leave. Turning about they both did so without hesitation. I turned to Norrington and lifted up my shirt.

"I like it really! I bet this type of scar will be a sweeping fashion in London!" I stated sarcastically.

"I wanted to apologize, it was never my intention to hurt you." Norrington said, I actually believed him. He came closer and grasped my hand. "I want to make it up to you. And if all is fair, you did lose our little duel."

"Lost? I was kicking your uptight wig wearing monkey suit sporting butt all over the place!" I exclaimed.

"Trust me, to be with me is what you want. I can make your life comfortable for the rest of your days." Norrington cooed sweeping hair out of my face. I pulled away from him, and I pulled out the compass. Flipping it open I was scared to think it would point to the Commodore. But it did.

Is he really what I want? Why would it point to him twice? Maybe this thing really is broken. I shook it and closed it and opened it again. Norrington looked at me confused.

"What on earth are you doing?" He questioned looking at me strangely.

"Finding out what I want." I said closing the compass and latching it to my belt loop. I grabbed Norrington by his hand and leaned in to kiss him. You can always tell if you want to be with someone by the kiss.

Mere inches from kissing the door behind the Commodore banged open.

"Oy! I'm gone one measly day and ye go off and find yerself another man?" It was Jack. "And here I was to rescue you." He stepped over a guard that he obviously used to open the door with.

"Jack!" I cheered as he came in to stand between Norrington and I. "Hey you guys, wait right there I said." Taking a few steps back I opened the compass one more time to show it was pointing at Jack. Phew!

"Where are you to go Sparrow?" Norrington asked. I scoffed, oh how little you know dear sweet Commodore.

"Thought me and the lass would go for a swim." He said throwing his hands up in a kind of resolute manner.

"I hardly think you will make it out of here before going straight to the gallows." Norrington sneered.

"Well in that case." Jack said pulling out his gun and pointing it at the Commodores head. I sighed and began to walk out into the fort.

Contrary to what the Commodore said we had a relatively easy time getting out, I karate chopped everyone I came upon and Jack just made threatening motions with his gun, and well after we got out of the fort, we kind of just, ran for it. I didn't say it was a well thought out plan. While running like two, well pirates, my side began to ache and I looked down to see my shirt soaked in blood.

"Jack, we have to stop!" I exclaimed.

"Can't luv, we are running from very scary men with lots of guns." he explained. I pulled his arm and stopped him pointing to my side he got is ucky face on and nodded. "Suppose a rest wouldn't hurt." He commented.

"You think?" I remarked, noticing we were just two blocks from the blacksmith shop I began to jog over to William's.

William was not there. The door was locked, and there was no way in. Frick. Me and Jack heard shouts from behind the building which invoked us to run, very fast to the only other place we might be able to hide my car.

By the time we had gotten to my car the spot on my shirt had doubled in size. We walked upon an odd sight. William underneath my car. Oh no, Orlie fans are going to kill me for running him over! Hearing us approach he scooted his way back out.

"It's fixed." William said.

Chapter Sixteen is done! The next chapter is the last and will probably be the shortest one! So do me a favor and review on that one! Hope you guys are liking it, and I hope I'm not rushing things through to get to the end, because I don't want it to end!! But all good things must end right? Well until next time!


	17. Chapter 17

Disclaimer: DOPOTC! Final chapter of Car Trouble in Port Royal! Are you excited? Sad? Misunderstood? Well then go see a therapist! On with it!

Chapter Seventeen: Going home.

I quirked an eyebrow at William. "Since when did you learn how to fix gas tanks?" I questioned.

"You taught me." Will laughed. Ah yes, I remember now. Shrugging, the pain in my side reminded me of my wound. I lifted up my shirt to reveal a stitch had ripped through my flesh creating a new fresh wound on top of my healing one.

"Damnit!" I yelled looking at it, stupid old world medicine! I pinched it together watching it stick for a moment before it popped back apart.

"Lass ye be alright?" Jack questioned. I turned to him grabbing a small knife he had on his persons. I began cutting the stitches apart pulling them out. The blood was trickling slowly down my side.

"What was the point of that?" Will asked me.

"When I go back home I don't want them to wonder why I have what looks to be animal stitches once I go to the doctors." I replied, patting my pockets I panicked when I didn't find my keys. "My keys are back at the shop!" I exclaimed feeling my stomach drop.

A small jingle lifted my spirits as William held up my set of keys. Smiling I took them from him and started at the silver mass of metal.

"Sure ye be wantin' to do this?" Jack asked in a final attempt to get me to stay. I looked at him and nodded.

"This is what I truly want." I replied.

"Liss, wait." William said stepping near to me he pulled me in and hooked a hand behind my neck and gave me a long kiss right in front of Jack. Who seemed very confused about this.

"Oy! I'm standing right 'ere!" Jack yelled waving his arms high in the air as William broke the kiss.

"Sorry Jack it had to be done." William said giving a sweet smile. I blushed a very pink shade. Catching sight of Jack's face made me giggle a little.

"Don't worry mate, you'll get him back one day." I said winking at Jack who still didn't seem happy about the whole thing.

"Bloody enchantress." Jack mumbled turning around to walk away which hurt a little. Turning back he gave me a quizzical look, "Me compass lass!" Jack said rounding about he lumbered towards me. I unlatched the compass and held it out in my hand. Jack reached for the compass but instead grabbed my wrist pulling my hand he drew me close to his body holding me tightly he kissed my forehead.

"Jack I…" I said getting teary eyed.

"Now lass, don't be making 'ol Jack get all emotional." He said wiping the corner of his eye.

"Don't you get tired of referring to yourself it the third person?" I asked laughing. Jack looked at me a little thoughtful and just shook his head.

"Watch out for fish people, and undead monkeys, don't take chief positions from strangers, and don't let Gibbs guard the Pearl." I said drawing away from him, but he roughly pulled me back and kissed me shoving the compass back into my hand he released me.

Standing there staring at the compass confused I glanced up at Jack who just motioned to the Compass.

"Be sure you are making the decision you want." Jack commented. I nodded and slowly flipped the compass open.

The needle pointed to my car, then shifted to William, then to Jack, and my car once more. It played this game for a few seconds before it settled on Jack. I sighed closing the compass.

"I suppose we have to go shove Elizabeth into the ocean. I just hope we don't run into Elvis here." I sighed tossing the compass back to Jack. Him and William looked at me confused.

"I guess I don't want to go home yet." I shrugged.

"That's me bonny lass!" Jack said smiling at me, I rolled my eyes and started walking back towards the town.

"Wait, where are you going?" Jack asked.

"You want the Pearl back don't you?" I called over my shoulder.

"Follow the lass!" Jack said to William who smiled and shook his head.

"Oh yea, Jack, you have a peanut behind your ear." I laughed as they caught up to me.

"How did that get there?" Jack asked flicking it to the side.

I looked over at Jack, and over at William putting a sore arm around both of them I looked ahead through the tree's to my new and most likely final home.

"Drink up me hearties YO HO!" Jack looked at me like I was crazy. Laughing I patted him on the back, "Let's teach it to the whole crew!" Jack smiled as we walked our way out into our next adventure.

It's done! Hope you enjoyed it, I will be working on my next story soon, hope you are looking forward to it! I'm not sure I will make a sequel it will take a lot of coaxing from fans. Anyway, please review on the last chapter! Thanks again to all my loyal friends for reading and reviewing, you guys have been great, and keeping my moral up! PM me, and check out my profile! Until the next story!

Liss!

P.S. I know the compass thing is confusing but I have to explain that Jack just happened to be in that general direction when she was with Will. And Jack was behind Norrington behind the door the second time. It's not like she wants them all... Just Jack! If you have anymore questions you want answered about this story PM me and I will be more than happy to answer them!


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